5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 1

TEACHING DURING PLAGUE MONTHS

(This is a record of our; B, R, and myself attempts to teach 5th grade at CC Elementary during this spring's shelter In place. As is often the case in text threads, there is usually more than one topic being discussed.)

(The three 5th grade teachers have been preparing all year for the grade's trip to Camp Colman, slated for the end of the month. Concerns about Covid-19 are starting to crop up.

B: teaching a 4th/5th class, is referenced throughout; an experienced colleague but not team teaching with R, B and Brian.)

 Tuesday, Mar 3 3:27 PM

(R-Science/Social Studies Focus): M and J are staying home because of the Coronavirus... Today J told me they are also talking about homeschooling.

(B-ELA Focus): Oh boy

(Brian-Math Focus): Noooooo!!

Tue. Mar 4 9:10 AM

R: Take away from meeting:

-Kids need to wash hands before going to lunch {20 seconds)

-district is buying spray bottles for each pod or class or something (they don't know specifics or when)

-direct parents to district statements about virus, if they have extra questions don't ask direct them to office who has talking points

-if school is canceled, we still have to work...more to come

Fri. Mar 6 10:35 AM

B: We just had two chaperones back out!!

R: For camp?! Male or female?!

B: One of each

S's parents. It makes sense since his dad died.

I think we have backups, and we didn't really need her anyway. It means three chaperones in two groups and four chaperones in two groups.

Wed. March 11 3:52

R: Can we even try to reschedule camp?

B: I can ask J but I don't know if the district will let us

Brian: I think if school is still in session, we're going.

If not, we don't then we worry about rescheduling.

R: Toby said at the meeting no camp.

Brian : What meeting?

B: The five minute stand up meeting at the end of the day today

Brian: #%€£¥ing ,!;&,@I/ PA system!! What did he say?

R: Everything's canceled until alter spring break when they'll reevaluate. No fundraiser camp or anything

Brian: I am so terribly glad to have yet one more thing to ponder.....

R: Might have borderline cried  on the phone lo my mother. So much wasted time and energy. The kids are going to riot.

Brian: How are parents and children going to be told?

B: He said he would inform everyone and that I didn't need to worry about posting anything. I believe he'll do that tonight.

Brian: Rule Learned Day I of Bootcamp:

shit rolls downhill.

Folks ain't gonna feel free to share their great disappointment: how DEVASTATED Lil' Johnny is, with either the superintendent or T.

But us teachers? We are just hankering to hear it all.

Maybe I'm just too much of a Negative Nelly...

B: I'd rather have them find out tonight and cry in front of their parents then find out tomorrow from us

R: Agreed

Brian: Well, there goes your trip to Europe.

B: Maybe. I'm hoping I can still go.

R: What happened?

B: The coronavirus. I think it's crazy here because Seattle has the most deaths in the US. Spain doesn't have the deaths we do, I am keeping close tabs on what's being said over there though,

Brian: Trump just gave a speech saying he was cutting off all travel between ug and Europe. The ban starts in a week.

B: Shut up!

Seriously?

R: Also Brian, can you keep up to date on Mexico too?

B: Sigh. No European travel for me.

Brian: You could go to the International House of Pancakes 'Cause it's INTERNATIONAL.

B: Yeah. Sounds the same.

I wanna cry right now with my first world problems.

R: This is a hard day for you, maybe take a mental health day. You earned it.

B: Ugh. I should but I won't.

Brian: I'll be monitoring the Mexico situation around the clock!

Slightly hesitant to plan one big hootenanny for those now free days since there's a good chance none of us will be at school that week.

Again, Mr. Glass Half Empty

B: I appreciate your optimism. JN did just remind me that I can still go to the U.K...

Thu.Mar 12, 7:25 AM.

Brian: Sad Becky,

Our Beloved Leader wasn't completely clear in his remarks last night. (Shock!)

 Looks like you could still to travel TO Europe.

Getting back though....

Hmmmm … sounds like the set up for a Lifetime movie of the week:

A young American traveler finds herself forced to remain in romantic Spain for an extended stay.

No demanding family.

No humdrum job.

Big slobbering dog 3,000 mile& away.

What shall she do?!?

The Hallmark Channel and "Ultrathins: The Bathroom Tissue That Will Last Twice As Long" is proud to present the following!

“Trapped in Barcelona” “Catalonia Confinement” “Iberian Love Prison”

(Okay, that last one might be less Lifetime and more uh, "other" premium cable channels)

Should probably get to work.

P.S. R, still monitoring the Mexican Beach Situation. So far, your Vaca looks a go!

R: I sent Becky a news article about travel and you send a movie proposal  Brian, when will I be able to achieve this level of commitment and sarcasm?!

B: You two make my dad days so much better. Thank you team Sad days. Not dad days.

Brian: Trust me. Some of my Dad Days are pretty bad.

R: I can't speak for Dad Days, but sometimes I come close to dad jokes.

Thursday, March 12, 3:52 PM

Brian: Holy %#€>ing! %#€£!!! SBA’s been cancelled!!! (Just heard from B.)

R: No...

Brian: Idea! Let's not tell the kid8...

R: Do you  know how much straight test prep I've been doing and we can't even measure if it meant anything

Brian: Again. Let's not tell anybody and just give them a fake one. A Fake Smarter Balance Assessment.

A FSBA....

R: Let's do some art

Brian: May is Ceramics Month!!

R: All month.

Fri, Mar 13, 12:40 PM.

(At about noon this day, Principal T informs the staff and students that school will be closed until at least mid-April. this is not shocking and the 5th grade team goes on the assumption that students will not be returning till next year. They attempt to send as much work home as possible, along with coats, lunch boxes and musical instruments.)

Brian: SS. asked for a REALLY big reading log. Can we swing it?

R: Yep

I'll get on it now.

Sun, Mar 15, 2:17 PM.

(The District has mandated/not mandated District Staff come into work the following week. Or not. Clearly, District upper management is waiting for guidance from OSPI on how to handle this situation.)

B: Soooooo

Since we don't HAVE to go into work Monday, do we want to meet up and establish a game plan?

Brian: Last I heard, we were supposed to go in M-W.  Did we just get a T call?

R: I thought we had to report normal hours

B:  Nope. Email.

We can work remotely.

Brian: Well, I'm pretty remote in the best of times

Regardless, I'm going in. I want to put all of Chapter II onto the website. Plus, I want  to figure out what else to do for our quarantined kids

B: I plan to go in too. Should we coordinate times? We need to definitely figure out what to communicate to

families and by what means we are going to communicate it to them.

Brian: Uh..8:30ish?

R: Tomorrow is the only day I'm going in, Tuesday and Wednesday I'm going to do remote. Are we even allowed to do all digital?

Brian: Sure

B: I think so. Tomorrow I'll meet you all there. Are we aiming for 8:30 to coordinate?

R: I'll be there.

I need to upload that packet I sent home because S’s dad wants it and I can imagine other parents will want one too, even if I did send them home.

Brian: 8:30!

Got it I'm gonna use Google Classroom and the website mostly. Who doesn't have internet access?

R: I don't know actually...we're not even privy to that information

Mon, Mar 16th, 8:17 AM.

B: I'm here. Whenever you wanna meet.

R: Pulling in

Mon, Mar 16th, 10:00 AM.

R: E wants us to bring report card envelopes up to her

B: I already left. Mine are on the shelf next to my table

R: Got them!

B: Thank you

Brian: Hey, T just renewed Mobymax for another year.

It's not as pinpoint as Redbird but it's an option. Not sure if you want any particular subject. Right now it's

-Fact Fluency

-Fluency Board games

-Mathematics

-Language Fluency Board Games

-Reading stories

-Vocabulary

-Sight Words

-Social studies

-Science

No clue on the board games.

Mon, Mar 16th 7:25 PM.

Brian: Did you read Dr. P's update for the week?

"…teachers should not be assigning work that will be a continuation of the classroom lesson. At this time, do not create packets or expect parents to pick up work or continue classes electronically/virtually. We are still waiting for guidance from the OSPI."

What the hell did we do then?

B: Exactly what they told us not to, Now I don't know what to do,

R: Sounds like don't do anything until they give us guidance

B: I'll make a post tomorrow that states that all work is optional.

R: But it might change...

B: True. I'll just write that at this point the work is optional.

Tue. March 17th. 6:20 AM.

R: "Please know that we can only provide families with enrichment support, (per OSPI guidelines). It is not equitable to require specific

assignments."

Obviously, I've been up like all night being an anxiety ridden teacher. I wish they would have said this from the get go. Well, I find measuring items by weight, length, or capacity VERY enriching.

Brian: Well, I find measuring items by weight, length, or capacity VERY enriching.

Don't worry about is. Our parents and maybe even our students appreciate what we did; which was make the best of a terrible situation. Equitable shmequitable.

B can do the CYA thing with a quick Bloomz text.

R: Do we keep giving them possible things until we get more direction Thursday or no?

Brian: Kids have plenty to do for this week. Let's let everything sit a few days in the hopes that the fine folks at OSPI can successfully remove their collective heads from their collective asses.

T mentioned this issue yesterday; didn't seem that big a deal. We Just don't officially require the work done nor grade whatever comes back. Bob's your uncle.

Of more import: the Hardy Family lawn is looking quite good now. All the fruit trees are fertilized. And my garage weight room is ready for business!

Xander's pretzels? Still not great.

I have a planned a test run of Quiplash today; trying to decide which Jackbox games work best remotely. Stay tuned.

R: You're right, I need to check these emotions right at the door.

Not that it's a competition but I am taping and painting a bathroom today... impressive I know

Perfect hopefully I can win this time!

B: So I think today my kiddos finally have a schedule they stick with. It starts at a mind numbingly early 10:00 am. Poor kids. I'll just quote what Brian said up above about OSPI and our suggestions for work. I think what we gave is enrichment. It seems fair enough.

I'm glad I'm not making any big decisions. I hope those people don't mess up too badly. What's the Moby Max school code? I should have it memorized but...

Brian: Password: fusput

Okay, I found that amusing when I set MM up: 6 years ago. STOP Judging me!!!

B: That's hilarious. I just put the school code into the post for Bloomz so they have other suggested resources.

Because I didn't have your sage advice when I posted, I hope it's ok. I did use what you texted earlier. Let me know if I

should change anything.

R: I like that. I think parents will appreciate the options

Brian: That's right. suggest, suggest, suggest. That's all we do.

B: I think we're doing well considering the world has turned upside down. Bay Area is in shelter in place status like Italy and Spain

Brian: I can see myself going a bit bonkers by 4/24. Must. Assess. Something...!

Not Howard Hugh's saving nail clippings and urine bonkers but I can see putting an unhealthy amount of the next month into doing battle with the raccoons.

R: I saw that! I also saw they aren't sure how strictly that'll be enforced which is scary to think what enforcing will look like!

Brian: "Local Teachers Fired For Risking Health By Providing School Work For Sheltering In Place Military Families During Pandemic"

said

no

newspaper

headline

EVER..

B: Right R?

We're going to walk a 5k today. The kids hate me but it's sunny and I hate staying at home all the time. J thinks I'm gonna have six pack abs by April 24. He's wrong. I fake it during the workouts.

Not a word Brian...

Fri, Mar 20, 4:58 PM

(Team 5th starts the process of putting their lessons online; a process new to them.)

B: Looks like we need to put some things on our google classroom starting next week.

R: Interesting. I hope they mean us, and  not like... all of 5th  grade in the  distinct

B: I believe they mean us. She sent us an email.

JZ sent another one. We form a new google classroom through which all of our communication goes to all of fifth grade. I think we are all admin on it. We should formulate subject areas (topics) within it for us to be in charge of. They're gonna distribute CB's to kids...

Brian: About time they listened to me.

Not completely sure what the math is going to look like.

If we do google classroom for everything... Well, my plan had been to start posting previous math chapters to the  website.

I'm not completely sure I can do all that from home. However, I am completely  sure I can do it with great ease if I'm in my

classroom.

With "The Closedown" next Tuesday, I guess I'll have to sneak in over the weekend.

Uh...we already have a g-classroom. (On which I have done diddly squat. You think J is talking something further?

What are you all thinking this Review, Refresh, and Practice looks like?

B: We have to have ONE classroom for all three of us. This means we need to create a new one. No worries though, I can invite all the kids to it. Super simple, All they have to do is click join when they open up classroom.

I only know about reading. I imagine it'll be me creating templates for them to fill out while they read online articles I  post.

Sat, Mar 21, 5:21 PM.

Brian: https://stories.audible.com/ This sure looks enriching.

The selection looks insane. And it's all streaming; no log in or payment required.

B: I posted it to Bloomz as an option for families today. It seems really cool.

Sat, Mar 21, 7:13 PM.

B: Finally got the backyard all cleaned up (almost). Too bad we're the only ones to enjoy it.

R: Those pavers look so good!

B: Thanks. I paid for them myself.

I wish they weren't so gray though.

R: I like the grey, hopefully they won't get dirty easily though

B: Ha haaa!! They're filthy right now. One of the things we have to do is pressure wash the patio and stain/treat the deck.

That's this summer's investment.

Sun, Mar 22, 11:40 AM.

Brian: Cool. Best get on that patio.

Okay, finally fired up the ChromeBook. No new email since Friday. That's downright eerie. But I did do some actual school work from home.

I know, right?!?

-The COVID-19 google doc is mathematically updated through the end of Week 4 (April 10th). I also goofed around with· the document's layout. Fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly and so on.

-As I understand it, this document will be used to update Bloomz..? Or, our google classroom? Maybe both.

-Speaking of G-classroom, I found my old ones but they're all from last year. Of no use

You guys have your own classrooms. Do you think I should do a math one?

-But on the subject of enrichment, I made another page on our site. it's called "April Math Enrichment" and it has pretty much EVERYTHING Chapter l: Place Value-related I could post.

sadly, any Word documents, like say all the tests, come out as goobly-gook and go are not posted. When I open said quizzes and test while on the desktop, it's not a problem, not so on the ChromeBook.

-Later on today; I'll find/post the answer keys to our current chapter. That is all for now.

B: Ok. We have to start a new google classroom that's grade level. I can do that tonight and add all the kids in. All they have to do is login and accept the invite. I'll past on Bloomz tomorrow morning that the classroom is live. What I understand is that the classroom doesn't have to be put into effect until afer spring break, but I just happened to know that CC's 2nd grade team is already up and running

I will make a topic area for each of us so we can each post what we want in there. Update the Covid 19 doc with what you put in the classroom and I can post it to Bloomz.

If your work will be posted on the website, just add a link in classroom on the math topic area to the website for them to complete.

Does this all make sense?

Brian: Sort of.

It's been a long while since I have done anything with classroom. But hey, I'm a white guy and so have a completely undeserved confidence I'll be able figure it out.

An example might help. How would I take a look at 2nd grade's handiwork?

Also, I really don't want Mrs S to feel left out. Any ideas?

Also can we do by teacher instead of subject, or at least can science and social studies be one instead of two?

B: Absolutely. That's kinda what I was thinking. We would have three sections, one for each of us.

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 2

Sun, Mar 22, 3:09 PM.

B: That's for you Bri. I figure you probably already know how to do it R.

Can I get your power school passwords again please? I need to get in to invite your kids. I already invited mine

R: Woah, I didn't realize that was you talking...

B: Yeah. Ava's community episode was super loud in the background. Sorry.

R: Guess I've never heard you on the phone or video...now I'm spooked

B: Maybe I should be a YouTuber

Brian: All I know is SOMEBODY keeps interrupting The Real Housewives of Atlanta marathon!

B: Sorry about that. Those Atlanta housewives are my kindred spirits.

Brian: I'll investigate this Classroom situation soon...

B: What do you think about sharing a slide show with all the kids and asking them to post pics of themselves on it? We could do a "camp days" thing where they have a focus each day and they can add pix from the theme of the day?

Wednesday: outside time pix Thursday: creating/ art/ fort Friday: ...?

R: What if they don't have a camera?

B: They can email them to me and I'll put them in there.

R: I need to read over the email of what the expectations for us is and what our are for the students

B: They said three things:

Refresh, review and practice. Put suggested items in the grade level classroom for kids to work on. That's the gist. You should read it anyway because I probably missed something.

Brian: Well, MY expectation is that I'm going to find out whether C and M are going to able to overcome their marital difficulties.

R: Hold up, Brian is actually watching Bravo...

Brian: Am I?!

It's right next to A&E's The Mummy Returns.

B: I wish I had Bravo right now. All I've been doing for days is cleaning stuff. I'm so over it. Today we cleaned and organized the garage, hence my awesome senior pic you two casually ignored.

Brian: What are you talking about? That lovely photo is my phone's new  background.

B: Well played Bri, well played.

R: The last 4 days have sucked, it's pretty much just consisted of prepping K's house and yard to sell...which is not fun at all. Also I hate yard work. I want Bravo and Housewives, your life is beautiful Brian. B, your photo and pavers are also easy on the eyes.

B: Awww. My bid for attention has been received. Thank you friends.

I actually like yard work but I don't like working with others I realized.

It's not letting me login as you guys. It's weird. I know I'm entering everything in correctly. I'll find another way to get their names. Don't worry

Ok. All our kids are invited. I'll add the assignments we have in our Covid doc to Bloomz tomorrow morning. The stuff we're adding right now they should have or can print off the website.

Brian: Thus far, we've managed:

-Roughly 10 episodes of BuffyTVS.

-Made all the birds and squirrels very fat.

-Checked the news about 15 times a day.

-Nearly killed myself attempting to do our 25-year-old "The Firm" workout videotape out in the garage.

-Listened to Xander ask about 100 different ways if he can play on the xBox.

-Send one box of books; whatever we had on hand,  to the Mother in Law in Winthrop. And a lot of yard work. Wendi’s considering buying a small green house off amazon.

I'm looking forward to an exciting week ahead.

B: Sounds riveting.

B: I love your feeder stand. Wendi does good work.

R: So I should essentially delete all due dates because we ca my grade anything so it's basically all just optional?

B: Exactly.

R: Cannot* not ca my

B: I figured. I got you girl

R: Do you think they expect like an assignment a day per subject or an expectation for the week?

B: We can do it however we want I imagine.

Mon, Mar 23, 7:56 AM.

Brian: "Cannot* not ca my"

is this code for something?

B: It was a correction from her previous text.

Brian: Oh, that’s much less naughty than I imagined.

B: It's 8 am Bri

Brian: And I am really caffeinated and really bored.

B: I am getting really good at sleeping in. I woke up at 7:30 this morning!!! That's late for me.

Of course my dreams were awful and I made a plan for the kids to make picture slide shows this week....

Brian: Looking at Q-Classroom (finally). Are we doing anything with the Grades page?

R: Nope we weren't not supposed to grade at this time (unless there's new news)

So we aren't supposed to roll out our classroom until AFTER spring break and post at least once weekly, plus T's supposed to approve it first.

I wonder how long this meetings going to be

B: I hope short. Maybe we can have T be a student in the classroom and he can look at it.

Brian: Huh?!? I spent 6 precious minutes linking to the 5th grade website for nothing?

I suspect the "After spring break" is the floor, not the ceiling. Believe it or not, some people procrastinate about things  like this.

Not us, of course.

T wants this stuff up and running ASAP.

And preferably up and  running better than those non-goodnicks at Ridgetop and Silverdale.

B: I'm not putting anything formal in the classroom now. I thought we could have options in there now that already connect to what we're offering as daily enrichment on Bloomz (see COVID doc.)

They can't possibly micromanage all of our classrooms. That's too much stupid work.

The second grade one has been up at running since yesterday morning.

R: I think it's going to be an hour+ meeting because he's going over the email and more. I'm hoping he'll let us tech savvy folk sign off early and not sit through a course on google classroom and resources.  We can tune out while he talks.

Wish we were having an 8:15 meeting like normal, but I guess he's ensuring everyone sleeps in AND checks their email in time

B: Probably. I didn't check my email until Bex told me about the meeting.

I just want you guys to know that I miss you and our banter. My kids just don't get me the way you two do.

Brian: Well, I would hope not!

I mean, R and her filthy, filthy mind and sense of humor...

B: Exactly why I appreciate her.

A has been watching community though so she's starting to look at me funny when J and I say stuff.

R: I'm not going to lie, during holidays when we play loaded Questions I always win. Probably the combo of midgets and chaps really gets to my family.

B: Sounds like successful combo

Brian: We need to figure out a way to play on-line games together. Better than what I've managed so far. Wonder if Zoom’s the answer.

R: At home games I can do, ii it's not too late

B: Me too. I hit a wall around 9

Brian: Question. Are you wearing headphones for the Zoom meeting?

B: No. I can though.

R: I'm making pancakes during zoom and blasting that Zoom

B: I have hearing aids so they have to be those big over the ear ones

Brian: I seem to be the only one in the meeting.

R: No video for me. I'm bumming it

Brian: Are you in?

R: Yes I like looking at everyone

Brian: How did you get there? I am in a meeting of 1.

R: There's a link In his email{s)

B: Click the link in the email he sent.

Brian: The Join Zoom Meeting link?

B: Yes

R: Is the ID 982-094

Brian: That's what the email said. Where do we enter that ID?

R: It entered it for me

B: The initial screen should give you the place to put it. Mine was already entered.

R: I sent you a new invite

Brian: Just lonely Brian...

R: Did it work?

Brian: Nope. Just. still. #%£ing me...

B: Want me to film it for you?

Brian: It's the right ID number for the meeting. Just me...

B: That's weird, I messaged T privately and told him your link was glitching but you've been trying to get in. He knows you're trying. I hope that's ok.

Do we want a grant for camp stuff? We could use the $ for snacks.

Brian: Thank you.

I ##€&'ing got out of bed and washed my hair for this shit!!

Sorry.

B: We appreciate your clean locks Bri.

Brian: I am now going to play Balloon Tower Defense 6.  Because it works.

R: Yes grant for camp will be cool

B: So for we have nothing mind blowing in this meeting. It's all we know so far.

I'll write it. I have so much time.

Brian: Just restarted the ChrBk. It's now working.

B: I really wish people would stop asking questions.

R: I'm watching you clean your nails BECKY

B: Creeper. Not fair that you turned video off.

R: And Brian's looking awful smug

Brian: I always do.

R: It's the bun I wasn't ready to share it, even though every other female is rocking it.

B: Truer

Or wet hair.

There you are Bri! Nice painting.

Brian: That’s a whole lot of T forehead we're seeing.

B: now that you mention it...

R: These angles aren't great... M’s playing with background. Respect.

Brian: He could sell advertising space and make a killing. Do we have any questions?

R: I don't.

Brian: Did he answer our Google Classroom questions? About whether we can start it now?

B: He said a lot of teachers have started it, but it doesn't HAVE to be live until the 6th. I won't tell students about it until Friday.

I'm gonna stop in and get some things too. I didn't realize the building would be open until 2:30.

R: Maybe I should go pickup my worms...

Brian: Probably should. I don't know if we'll actually go back to school this school year.

R: Ugh, such a far drive far vermin

Brian: Worms are vital to our way of life. You treat them with the respect they deserve!

R: Fine, after I steam the floors and eat these pancakes.

Brian: I overestimated your love for your worms.

R: They need such a small amount for like a month...whatevs they'll beef up once they get home.

Brian: I can break into your classroom and whisk the worms away if you want. Or I can feed them.

Brian: So last call for Clear Creek Muff...

R: I was going to drive out there to get them

Unless you wanted to take them on for an undetermined amount of time

Brian: Ahhh!!

My glove got caught in my zipper!! I am exposed!! And my fly has little blue chunks stuck in it.

R: Thanks for the visual

Brian: ...In retrospect, this may have been a bit of over sharing.

R: So did you want to babysit the worms for awhile Brian? They can live in your garage for a month, eat like once every other week

Fine I'll go get my own worms

Brian: Whoops! I've already left. Sorry. Am at Home Depot now. Where business is booming!

B: Hey, here is an idea. If you are still at CC, maybe think about taking some photos so we can jazz up our G-Classroom, Also, maybe one of us (still at school) could bring home some of the poster pads. (Like the AR progress poster is on in B's room.)

We could use them to post student achievements on classroom. I'm thinking Redbird minutes per week; stuff like that. A little bit of home for the kids.

Brian: I already left school. We can put together a doc to share with them too.

Mon, Mar 23, 4:11 PM.

Brian: Well, this kinda sucks.

The following students have disappeared from Redbird:

H: E and J

R: A, S, S,  C, I, S, L, M, and S

B: A, A, B, D, and J

I've contacted T and J. Not a great way to start out.

B: M's login won't work either.

Brian: Could you send out a Bloomz saying we're aware that many kids are able to log onto Redbird and that we'll contact everyone as soon as the issue is fixed?

R: I even had his mom just try to login to his google drive, that didn't even work. Did we just contact C?

Brian: Just texted T.

Then emailed him and C.

R: I like your style

Brian: If you have another person to pester, I'm all ears,

R: I would like to once again like to voice my gratitude with this team. You're both awesome.

Brian: Yes, it is.

B is also okay.

B: We're awesome.

I'll Bloomz it out right now.

Tue, Mar 24, 9:18 AM.

Brian: J wrote back this morning to say the Classlink had sync issues yesterday but today everything should be back to normal.

Now we only have 13 missing fifth graders!!

Congratulations, A, J, and M! You can now do math!

B: Ugh. Yay?

Sigh. I got an extension on iXL until June 30 so at least they have that.

Brian: Yes, I just removed what little I posted already.

Don't do any work till the second week of April. Got it! (That’s how I interpreted B's words!)

B: Bloomz is being a jerk this morning. I've been trying to post for 40 minutes.

R: Bloomz has been super delayed, I'm going to say that it's the amount of people using the platform.

Brian: If they don't get their act together, we may need to ask for a refund.

B: It's free.

D has been posting all morning. Seriously, like five times. He's singlehandedly slowing it down.

R: I was planning on just posting the doc on my own classroom (since I asked them to type their final) and submit it...then Paste to our new classroom the last Sunday of spring break

B: Sounds perfect.

Brian: Presumably, it's fed up going both ways so parents are figuring it as well.

R:  B you're funny. I've been cooped  up too long.

B: Are you saying my humor is only funny while cooped up? I would venture to say I'm funny all of the times.

Brian: Nope. No humor here.

I did unleash a very amusing pun at Mrs. C and CP. this morning.

B: Well played. A pun is always fun.

Tue, Mar 31,5:00 PM.

R: Literally did not see the T happy birthday one...only the miss our students one

Am I a bad employee?

B: Nah.

Brian: Yes, yes you are!

Sat, Apr 4, 5:33 PM

B: Does anyone know what's up with the report cards? When did they go in the mail?

Brian: Don't know.

Losing touch with work reality.

B: Yeah. Me too. I dreamt I caught the Rona last night and woke up super motivated.

Brian: I dream of squirrels....

B: I assumed.

Brian: So, I do not have the report card information. Have you gotten parent inquiries?

B: Yes. I haven't gotten S and C's yet either so I just don't know when they went out.

R: I'm not sure either. I do know I gave the actual envelopes to E the initial Monday we did onsite planning.

Brian: My Brilliant Son decided to hide the last bag of Doritos; the bag that Wendi decided to purchase as a special treat for good behavior: the bag that was STILL in hiding because Xander has yet to show ANY good behavior.

But he discovered it AND decided to take it out of hiding and then put it in his room. Perhaps hoping his dottering old parents would forget about the Last Bag of Doritos

My point being, we haven't seen any report cards but we wouldn't put anything past Senior Numb-Nuts.

Sun, Apr 5, 6:26 PM

Brian: Okay, it's time.

Been putting it off in hopes that, I don't know, that I'd retire before it came to it. Or get hit by a bus But neither of  those things will happen before the end of spring break. More's the bad luck.

Okay, go how does Bloomz work? I'm thinking I should be at least slightly available for all this enrichment I'm providing. At least from 8:00-5:00 each weekday.

...Wendi's spending this evening looking up haircut videos on YouTube…

I am doomed.

B: At least you can stay inside until it grows in a bit.

R: B, lol

Brian, have you created a login for Bloomz hefore?

B: Download the app on your phone and login with your email.

I'll post Bloomz daily updates for families by 8:30 every morning. I'm gonna post what we've placed on the Covid doc. Update it at any time because I'll look at it each day before I post. I can lead anyone who has questions to your email. I posted a long post on Bloomz yesterday. Take a look at it. I'm going to place another link to the video on how to login to Google from home for the kids who haven't yet done that.

R: I also just sent you an invite

B: There you go. That'll be easiest.

I just have to say that the fact we are doing daily updates is super helpful as a parent. The second grade classroom has so much stuff in it I don't know where to begin.

R: I got a long email with a word document from W's preschool teacher of a minute to minute breakdown of 3 hours of "enrichment" for the next couple of weeks…not daily or weekly down.

B: Three hours for two weeks? You'll have it made.

R: No, 3 hours a day. Then a layout.

Example: 6 min of music and dance (You Tube link) l0 min of reading aloud to child

5 min of your child reading their own book

B: and work from home.

Fortunately, we are sharing the classroom. We only have to give feedback on our area

R: It'll be great.

Brian: My work email? Because I'm checking that 2, maybe 3x a day by logging into my school account.

I have less than no interest in forwarding my school email to home or, Heaven Forbid, my phone so, how do you get any parental replies?

15 reply texts in 30ish  minutes? Yeesh.

B: I will refer parents to your work email. I would never try to link work to personal. Ever.

R: I'm losing it. It took me a solid 3 minutes to remember who K is.

Brian: We have a K?

Do you gals Just check your school emails throughout the weekend?

B: Nah. I get the Bloomz message notifications on my phone. I haven't really gotten any except one about report  cards.

Brian: Do the parents see our email addresses? I ask because I have this amazing yahoo address: lowpriorityaccount, that I send all the… uh... non-vital email to and it's on my phone.

Obviously, I wouldn't want our parents sending their vital questions/ concerns to such  a non-professional account but if

they were just sending things to the Bloomz app.

B: No. They should only be seeing your Bloomz message page.

Mon, Apr 6, 10:21 AM.

R: Isn't A M's mom? Like the M who is no longer a student at CC? I get her wanting him to do work, but she didn't even make sure he completed his hw

Brian: I'm thinking maybe his Classlink is deactivated because he's not enrolled anymore.

B: That's probably it.

R: Bloomz just notified me about the message, I've been replying lo the comment

B: I messaged her back.

Why do teachers post a doc and ask kids to make a copy and then share it with them? Why don't they just make it "make a copy for each student". Seriously! They are making it so freaking hard for all these kids. (Namely my two)

R: Maybe they don't know about that option, it took me like a year until I saw that option and it changed my life. Now I'm a template Queen. I just did 100, she wants us to fix it

B: No. I want to email the second grade team and show them. I don't imagine B and D are super receptive to feedback right now. I know I wouldn't be.

Brian: A meeting in 15. You all attending?

B: Yep

R: I wasn't planning to because she's not my home room and she doesn't have an IEP in any area I teach. I gave W feedback last week

Brian: COVID-19 doc updated on math through April 24th. Guess we'll have to go back to work after that.

B: I don't imagine we will be going back to work at all this school year.

R: My mental sanity is on the line...

Ps I replied lo a student comment on on assignment Not assigned by me, if I'm wrong or stepping on toes please tell me!!!

Mon, Apr 6, 2:40 PM..

Brian: No toes being stepped on here!

B: Here either

 I slew just closed schools through the end of the year.

R: I know about auburn but haven't researched anywhere else

B: I slew just announced it.

I slew

Inslee*

R: We're probably going to follow...

B: We have to. He just extended the closure through the end of the year.

R: Ps. I've been damage controlling all day. I feel like IT or customer service for parents and students, not teaching Oh. lnslee, not a slew (like a lot) of schools.

B: Me too! Some of them we BOTH were talking things through. Apparently, when they sign into classlink, many students don't have classroom loaded in. I have just been having them login the traditional way with email.

R: So. This feels super shitty. I'm super upset and not just because I'm stuck at home remote teaching. I feel like a total cry baby right now.

B: I get it. We have no control and we have no idea how to teach our kids. My impression is that we'll go pass/ fail  for this year so it'll be easier than traditional grades.

R: We're not even supposed to be assessing anything technically or introducing new material. Pass or fail makes sense, like if kids didn't get it before they might have it now alter all this enrichment.

B: Well, new teaching is supposed to start next week. I just don't know how we can do that.

Mon, Apr 6 5:43 PM

Brian: "I slew the rest of the school year..."

Wow, that J sure likes sending us private comments!

Will B be adding lots and lots of technically challenging activities?

Tragically, I can't check this "YellowStone" activity without  finding the ChromeBook. Xander's signed in to this desktop. Speaking of this iMac.....

On the plus side, through my very limited technology skills AND well-worn credit cards AS WELL AS a large helping of

Vulgarities, I have ALMOST managed to get Jackbox kind of running on the desktop using Zoom.

And Wendi’s new cheese making kit came in.

See you tomorrow in Zoomland

R: I don’t know if she’s gonna keep posting. I asked her about the things the posted and asked her to use the COVID doc because I like to make it all about us.

She posted resources mostly. She also posted the YellowStone thing that request for some kids to make a copy.

Why?!?!?! Why can’t teachers just select “make a copy for each student?!?!” It drives me nuts

Hold up. Wendi’s making cheese?

Brian: Well she’ll give it a try!

Last night she watched a lot of raising chickens 101 Youtube videos.

B: Chickens are filthy creatures

R: I wish she would respond to kids asking questions about the assignment she posted, because I wasn’t well versed in the virtual tour but I am now. I’ll update the doc this week about my project for next…

I also want chickens, W and I can start a chicken gang.

Brian: Who all is (are?) getting the student comments? I mean, we all are, is she?

And Mrs B, you’ll rue your rash words when the R Family and mine are luxuriating in chicken eggs.

B: I got zero comments and none of my students turned anything in or asked questions about it.

Well A did, but that’s it.

You can bring me eggs any day and I will be so grateful. I just don’t want you to bring me a chicken.

Brian: Our (theoretical) chickens will be a whole lot more use in the coming apocalypse than your big, slobbery dog.

R: I get emails every time someone comments on an assignment, then my phone vibrates and a banner comes up with the email.

Brian: I got them in my email.

R: I talked to R about primary sources. I also talked to M about if she’s required to do S’s assignments. I also talked to J twice. Maybe someone else. I also talked with a few parents but that wasn’t Google Classroom.

Brian: What the hell?

B: Idk, Norman has a lot of meat on him

I don’t even see comments on any assignments. Are they in the stream or the class work tab?

R: Private comments

B: I don't see a Private comments section.

R: like under the assignment there is the instructions then the other tab with student work. kids leave comments there by their work

B: I see it now. I had to google it.

Brian: Are the comments required?

B: No.

Brian: Well, let's turn them off.

B: I just wanted to make sure I could see and answer the questions about the things I post.

R: Which is why I sent the message this morning because I talked to R about her deleted slideshow and didn't want to step on toes I think kids need to clarify any confusion on assignments and that's the only way they have

So the voicemail From T said 90 min a day of learning and no trimester 3 report cards

B: Nice. What about that learning? How do we go about that?

R: Guess we'll find out tomorrow on Zoom : / / /

B: Yeah. That's kinda reassuring. Between what the four of us are putting in, we should easily accomplish 90

minutes.

R: Agreed.

Brian: Just as long as I have time enough to manage my chicken investigations. And fruit tree pollination.

B: And no grades!!

B can manage math. You get to your farm. I need fruit and eggs.

Brian: Wendi's grand daddy wasn't one to pass up a bowl of squirrel stew.

B: Hmmmmm. You should try that out and master it before we aren't allowed to leave our homes ever.

R: Start. A. Squirrel. Farm.

Brian: Drove through town today. Pretty sure Farmland is currently open.

And somehow, Staples is STILL open! Again, I am forced to say: What the Hell?

The ankle biters getting any use out of that Wii U?

You know, when they're not pestering during a Zoom session? Wendi and I are playing co-op Xbox a couple/ three times a night.

B: They play sometimes but believe it or not, they've been playing outside and doing crafts. It's kinda great, except for all the craft crap my mom sent that they keep using and leaving all over the floor.

They were on Wii U a ton at first.

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 3

Mon, Apr 6, 7:46 PM

Brian: Down to my last 4 Fireballs.

Shit’s gettin' real now...

B: I think cash and carry is open. Or...maybe you can order some fireballs when you order your chicken coop from amazon.

Tue, Apr 7, 7:35 AM

R: I wish we kept the 8:15 meeting times, start our day off with a certain mindset. This mid-morning isn't for me,

B: Me either honestly. The kids start their thing right at ten and they need help sometimes. I get why he does it, but I would prefer 9

R: I feel like we're expected to be available from 8-3:30 so we should just get it over with. I'm still getting up early

Brian: lt's 7:42.

I am wearing pants and a t-shirt.  FTW!

R: Versus what? No pants and no shirt?

Brian: Staying in your PJs till lunch.

Which I have heard that SOME people do.

B:  I'm still in PJ's.

Brian: A-Ha!

B: I plan to actually shower and get ready around 8:30 though.

R: Now that you mention it, I usually shower then bathrobe it all day until right before K comes home from work, then I change into clothes so I look like a functioning human

*hair-flip*

Brian: Me, too! (Also, hair flip!)

B: I knew a lady that was a SAHM and she did the same thing. She did makeup and  everything  right before her man got home.

Brian: (Though not the K part.)

B: How is the hair that you're flipping Bri? Did Wendi cut it yet?

R: I get ready in the morning B

B: Name your squirrel Kevin

R: it's a bad name, a squirrel deserves it

Brian: Nope, I'm going for the Fabio look now.

B: According to your text you bathrobed it all day...

Brian: Well, more like Flabio right now.

B: Do it!!! Tiger King is back in style. Let R bleach it. She knows how.

R: Well, I have bleach but I don't actually know how...I'll YouTube it like Wendi would

Brian: I'm not an expert in the field but can a cosmetologist bleach hair via Zoom? Is that like a premium-level feature?

R: I think you'll have to show your support by waiting

B: I feel like it would cost less because you would be doing it for them using their instructions. And they can leave the meeting before they have to see you cry at the results.

R: I miss you two, I didn't want to admit it but I will.

Brian: I miss you all as well.

Uh, one of you, anyway.

B: I miss you guys too - My moody teenager is not appreciating my movie choices. Please tell me you either know all the words to A Chorus Line or would at least appreciate me singing all the words while we watched together

Brian: You know what you did..

R: Never heard of it

Brian: The squirrels tell me things.

B: Secret spoiled: we were both in on it.

R: GRL PWR

Brian: There was a Simpsons parody of a Chorus Line so I know that part. Sort of.

B: See,  better than A who told me Grease 2 was better

R: Grease 2...why did she watch that

Dirty Dancing 2 is probably better though

B: S got a quarantined haircut,

She watches it because I know all the words to that one too

Stop it! There's a DD2?!?!

Brian: My Beloved son was really unhappy about watching Apocalypse Now.

I told him he could read one book of my choosing OR 2 movies of high quality. He chose the movie option.

B: I would've too. Although that one sound a little too close to home for the times. Please tell me the other one isn't Contagion?

R: Havana Nights...

You crazies. Both of those movies are awful.

B: Next up on our movie list: Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion.

R: Who are you? You hate movies.

B: I never watch them  really. That one is funny. I also have Night at the Roxbury on that list.

R: W and I have already watched the entire trilogy of LOTR, we'll probably go back for more this week. Add Napoleon Dynamite to that list, that was my jam at A's age.

Brian: Xander was such a turd during AN, I decided to assign him the classic Heart of Darkness.

B: We just borrowed it from a friend (porch pick up)! I'm super excited to show her that one.

Brian: He says he finished it yesterday. I've gotta come up with an AR quiz.

R: Make it a hard one.

Brian: Apocalypse Now??

B: We borrowed Napoleon Dynamite. Classic cinema. She'll never look at a Tina the same again.

R: Heart of Darkness? Never heard of it...

I'm about to watch some cult documentaries on Netflix

B: Tell me which ones. I'm actually sitting in front of the Tv on occasion. J got a TV for the garage.

R: Wild Wild Country is what I'm planning on watching.

Brian: Best thing ever: during the last Buffy the Vampire S1ayer night, one of the episodes had a reference to Apocalypse!

Xander looked at me with his patented disregard and curiosity look and asked if I'd planned it.

Yes, son. Yes I did.

B: You are magical!

Adding WWC to my list.

R: Okay I like that.

Also, B, Amazon has Making the Cut which is pretty much Project Runway, I know you had that on as background noise for awhile.

B: I'm all caught up on Making the Cut. I've been looking forward to it since I heard about it. Tim Gunn is my secret wise uncle that I talk to when I feel like Jesus isn't interested in my petty whining. I go to Tim for sage advice.

Brian: Sigh. The movie is based upon the Joseph Conrad novella "Heart of Darkness" And there is an amazing documentary about the filming of the movie by the same name.

(Sigh)

You two SURE you went to college?  Like a real college?

R: I did get my masters at WGU so I'm not certain.

B: Yeah, mine was Walden. I had to mail my payments to three different places...

Brian: This conversation has diverged wildly.

Tue, Apr 7, 9:28 AM

Brian: WGU? Walden?

This explains much.

Like your shocking ignorance of Frances Ford Copalla movies

The man's a genius! A genius, I say!!

B: It's Coppola

Ok, I'm actually happy that it's just us again. It'll be easier.

R: Honestly I wish he would just tell All OF 5TH something at older.

I'm getting kids saying google earth doesn't work so they can't do Yellowstone...what should we do?

B: Excuse them. Hey girl! Your hair looks good.

R: Are you guys seeing someone continually calling in to T?

B: No. I got  kicked off zoom and am trying to get back in.

Brian: I thought it was at 11:00. This explains my tardiness joining the meeting.

R: Who is this S? I don't recognize her...is that a title para?

Brian: ?

R: She keeps messaging but I don't recognize her

Brian: Do we know anything about Imagine Learning?

R: No one does. Right now it’s just Ell

At l0:50 I have to meet the stove repair man, if anything new comes about after that please enlighten me.

Brian: I can’t stop yawning.

Becky, can we Zoom after T signs off?

R: I'm excluded, excuse me

B: Can you give me some zoom detox time? How about in 15?

Brian: 15 it is

Maybe more like 25

B: Ok. Text it to me please. I'm trying to make the kids some lunch

Brian: Same. Only just lunch for me.

Inviting now…

B: Email or text?

Never mind. Got it.

Where are you R!

Brian: Okay young lady,

Here is what we decided during our Official Meeting Of Important People.

1) We hate the Yellowstone activity. It's getting deleted.

2)  We'll be transitioning the Classroom into a days of the week layout; similar to the Covid Document. That's what 2nd grade is doing and you know what a fan of theirs Becky is.

3)  This Classroom switcheroo will take place over the weekend. Becky will send out a Bloomz message on Friday saying "Under Construction Till Monday".

4) We're going to go through all the invites to see who hasn't joined Classroom. These incommunicado parents will need to be contacted another way. T needs these names by Friday.

5) B has too many crafting items but no bleach. Go figure. That is all I can remember.

On Bloomz now. I...loathe its layout on the ChromeBook. There are messages from early last year.

We seem to have iXL log in requests from AT, and H. If I'm reading it correctly. More investigation is required.

B: I got those to the kids already. Don't worry about iXL stuff. I can handle it.

Sounds like a good summation Bri.

I can also address the messages and then filter them out to you if it's something you need to address. That way you don't have to worry about messages at all.

R: First off, I'm sorry. I went to K's and then stopped by my mother’s after. She talks a lot and in the process my child took my phone to the playroom and indulged in YouTube kids. I'm just seeing this.

I agree with #1 tenfold. I was about to tell you I'm deleting it.

2.     I like the m-f idea on the classroom

3.     Do you want to send the list Friday or before then?

Apparently my drafted emailing was accusing Family H, I hope to repair our relationship  before June :)

B: Let's do the COVID doc to plan ahead and then post things on Friday evening - Sunday evening.

R: Perfect.

Who is AJ?

Never mind, it's probably A

Brian: First, just like Ms. R, I like the M-F'ing idea mentioned above, though I'm a little disappointed in your saucy language. How did you insult the H Family? And where can we find their reply so we can properly make fun of it?

AJ?

B: LH.?

R: His dad, yes. He said that it came off accusing of not being on Google Classroom, it was a broad statement so I've got to watch that Yeah someone asked for AJs login and I got confused until I realized it had to be A.

B: Ummmm ...was L in the classroom?!?! If he wasn't, the reason he felt it was accusatory was because he hasn't done what he was supposed to do. Hence, guilt and feeling accused.

R: He is and he even informed me in the email  they have already "seen the content". Such an odd duck

B: Wow. Glad we don't have to face our accusers while he holds his 11 year old son's  hand.  Ok. That was petty. Sorry.

R: 700 requests for CBs and they're not accepting anymore. They're scared the tech isn't coming back.

B: Maybe. You gotta accept that we're gonna lose some CB's. Journeys may not be mandatory. SI said they don't have to do it.

also, I deleted the Yellowstone thing and posted an announcement about it. Some folks were sad they did the work so I want to be able to honor those kids somehow (except I deleted who did it). Oh well, you live and learn.

R: So many messages. 5 in the last two days.

B: Oh my lord. N's mom is wondering how you can expect a student to write an opinion without putting in "I think" or "I believe"...

State it like it's a fact.

"Schools shouldn't assign homework. "

"Schools assign too much homework"

Any op ed piece has statements that are opinions without I think or I believe.

R: I wrote a short essay back to her with examples. I'm proud of Nathan for holding his ground with her. The scary part is she just graduated with her degree in elementary education. I explained we're using claims and evidence, that students don't need to actually write out I think or believe. Ss mom...dang. She wants to know where the articles and evidence are for the primary source journal. Do they even look at the assignments before messaging us?

B: I don't think they do, It sounds like she is confusing two assignments.

Also, in 6th grade opinion turns to persuasive. Having them state an opinion without I think or I believe, it prepares them for the next step.

R: Oh girl I did mention that. Hit them with the cold hard facts. Perfect.

Wed, Apr 8, 9:23 AM

Brian: Okay, I'm going proofing the Yearbook and I'm... RG. Wasn't that a girl? I mean, isn't that a girl? Or have I finally lost it?

Or, perhaps there is a third explanation?

R: RG is indeed a boy, you're thinking of R  But don't forget we still have RB

Brian: R... R.. too many homophones.

B: Yeah so many R, R, R. Too many.

And 4 L's.

Like the year we had 4 H/H/ H/ H

R: I sent R a gift card for Starbucks for a week, you think she'll brave the drive thru?

B: I only have five kids not in the google classroom yet. I'm gonna give them today before I call to hopefully walk them through the tech.

Yes. She drove by our house last night.

You are so sweet.

If she won't, her hubby might.

R: Perfect.

I feel bad because she is doing so much more then gen ed.

I'm glad at the approach CK is taking. A lot of my teacher friends have to do zoom lessons...

B: I am too. Zoom is sketchy. Some guy was defending his dissertation and someone hacked into it and drew a penis on his screen. I can only imagine what kids would do.

I might Screencastify a lesson or two for writing but that's it.

So when we go to days of the week for the classroom, how should we approach week-long projects?

R: Right, we don't want to repost it daily or have then get a completely new doc or slideshow. Maybe we just add the instructions under each day of the week

B: Sounds good. Then we can post the project under Monday?

R: Exactly.

B: Ok. I'm putting something together for the week of April 20. It's a slide show, reading, writing thing for landmarks and monuments. I'm going to I regrade a way for them to create something as a monument to the COVID epidemic or something. ldk yet.

Right now I'm doing stuff like Eiffel Tower, Vietnam War Memorial, etc.

R: The idea of them having a different doc everyday means that at the end of the week when it's time to put it all together they'll have too many tabs to keep track of

B: Right. There's got to be an easier way than the way Second grade is doing it. Sam and Clio have so many tabs to open. They have a slide show articles and videos, a separate doc. They have to make a copy of to write on and then share with their teacher.

R: No good. We don't want that. We want it straight forward. I'm glad none of our parents are asking for packets. Also the comments on Bloomz had me feeling a bit weepy seeing parents be so supportive and flexible.

B: The comments made me glad I made the mistake of deleting the project early. Everyone is being so great about things.

 
Thu, Apr 91 8:24 AM.

Brian: Hey, how are we going about learning who needs the work packets?

Two of my students on waiting for their ChromeBook, LG and T, so I guess I'll start with them but what are you guys doing?

R: I think they have to request one. None of my students have requested it.

Brian: They request it from us teachers and we pass that request onto T? Or are parents supposed to contact T or the District directly?

B: I haven't put it out there yet. I noticed on the second grade Bloomz posts, that most of the parents wanted one. I think we need to communicate that they are provided ONLY if students don't plan on doing any online work.

They tell us and we fill out the form T emailed.

R: I also haven't put it out there.

B: I can post something today in Bloomz. I'll make sure to add that it's ONLY if they don't plan on completing any online work. It's instead of not in addition to.

R: Yeah I think we need to be explicit. Otherwise, I think a majority will just opt out of tech and want a packet to complete

B: Yeah. Almost every family in C and S's class wanted a packet

Brian: Ugh. I can see the parents' reasoning. Work is work and a packet doesn't take up the computer or bandwidth. And the tech support required on a piece of paper? Rather minimal.

The fact that WE see daily G-CRoom activities as being more useful than a big old work packet is irrelevant.

I think the Print shop is going to have to bite the bullet on this one. It's not like they've got a ton of other work on back order.

How big are these 5th grade bundles? Any way to get a look see before they go out?

B: I don't think we can see it. The only hardship I see for us is that we're supposed to be continuing learning and I

don't know how to prove that or contact families easily when they aren't online.

R: Is the district making 5th packets for two weeks or us?

Brian: District.

B: And that means we have no idea what is in them.

R: That would mean less work for us potentially, but it just truly feels like busy work.  I have mixed feelings.

B: It could potentially mean more if we have to continually contact those families though. I don't know if they're new learning packets or review packets. New learning is supposed to start Monday.

R: I hope our families just want to keep doing everything digital.

Brian: Well, I think we've got to throw anything and everything at the wall to see what sticks.  Packets? Sure. Not ideal but it's something.

R: Yes

B: Yeah. I agree. We are obligated to let them know. I will also mention they have to be picked up.

R: Just went back through the guidelines sent from J. I do better with a straight rubric, but I'll be flexible. My plan is to do science next week then get into colonial America. I'll update the google doc.

B: Ok. Are we still gonna take a week each for projects? Or, do you want me to focus on reading short passages and comprehension/vocabulary and you do projects?

R: I think next week will be a stem/engineering project, the following background knowledge.

I need to sift a little further because I want the motivation to be higher. Right now they don't have that knowledge

B: Ok. So, do you want me to do projects too? Two projects in a week is too much.

I can also focus on short reading passages and questions/ vocabulary

R: Trying to reach all kiddos from R to say A with the material is a little more challenging than if we were in the physical classroom.

B: True

Brian: I'll just continue with review math lessoning? And maybe a new math activity each week? Maybe a couple of activities? I don't know. Feels like there should be more but I really think sticking with what the kids know/are comfortable with seems the plan.

R: I'm sorry for not being on that Zoom call. I feel like I'm not being very articulate via text. I'll draft what I'm thinking and send if out today! With content based literacy we can kill two birds with l stone here that'll lead up to a project.

90 min a day with math is like nothing so I'm trying to be respectful of that

B: I think CAL stuff is great. I just need to know what I need to develop. I thought we each were going to take a week. Either way works. If you wanna do two weeks back to back, I can do two weeks, back to back.

R: I just want to make sure I'm pulling my weight is all

B: Just let me know. I'll keep developing the project I've been working on around monuments/ landmarks

R: Okay I'll do science next week. You do monuments the following because we've already established that, then just know I'm doing SS and we can touch base about what they'll look like because it def cannot be done in a week

Brian: I don't know if this was always the plan from the start but that Covid document is very helpful for me to 'see' the next week; next month.

As opposed to just posting a crapload of activities I found somewhere on the internet.

B: Right. I can definitely help with SS. I'm a history nut.

They have had almost no background on landmarks/ monuments. I was going to teach them with my project. However you wanna do it is cool with me. We can completely skip my project. I can just start putting something together for Revolutionary War if you want and you focus on Science.

R: I thought you hated the revolutionary war...

B: I don't love it that's for sure. It's boring history but I wouldn't hate doing it my way... History is still my jam.

R: Would it be easier to split it up?

B: Split up what?

R: Content. Like you SS and me science, then we could just do content based and we don't have to worry about overlapping because we're still working on CCSS within the subject.

I know I've been doing both, and I'm def not trying to slack off I'm just thinking it might be easier for planning purposes. You can say no.

B: Yes. Let's do that. Unless the admin tell us different, let's split it up.

That makes it easier for me too my friend. For realsies, I would much rather do content than random reading passages.

R: *air five*

B: I submitted S's paper request just in case you hadn't gotten around to it yet. Bri, do you want me to do T and LG's?

R: Thank you, I was about to do that.

Brian: Thank you but I already filled out the packet request forms for those two.

B: Ok. I didn't do it

Brian: It's mildly offensive that JZ listed the form four (4!) times in the email T forwarded. Just mildly so.

B: It was confusing. I thought she wanted us to fill it out twice. Once to request and once to track. I almost did but then realized it's the same drinking form.

*Stinking

Brian: It makes me kinda wanna have a drink or two..

B: Me too. Unfortunately, I'm only allowed to drink when I'm in another country and I won't be doing that anytime soon...

Brian: Must get away from ChromeBook/ school. Going out to tidy the garage.

R: Tomorrow is pressure wash. Today is actually decide which virtual lab will really hit ii home

B: Tomorrow is zoom meeting day. I have a zoom yoga class and a zoom IEP. Must wash hair today though.

We already tidied garage, replaced all the mismatched hangers into matching ones and cleaned backyard. I think I might have to tackle my closet next. Not excited about that though. Goodwill isn't accepting anything.

R: Think of me while you're going through your closet

B: I will except you are tiny mama and I am...not

Brian: Worked on the garage decontamination stations. Table A is the first step. Most items, I'll just leave for a day or two. If  it's food stuffs, especially refrigerated items, I wipe it down first to accelerate the process.

The Costco delivery was so large and unexpected, we needed to leave some items on the floor.

Table B (upper right corner) is the next stop for items. It’s another day or two of just sitting before coming into the house.

The mail just sits on Table B till we get interested enough to bring it in.

Tina's birthday check came in today. (Yea!) Unfortunately. I have Very little interest in risking life and limb by going to a bank to deposit it. (Boo!)

We actually have multiple checks in the same situation.

I also checked the fruit trees, lifted weights, practiced my guitar, gave X a new book to read, and adjusted the Bird Feeder Situation.

Tonight, it’s a bonfire in the fire pit to get rid of all of our financial paperwork. Wendi's been tidying up the office like mad, trying to find the one. blasted. document! So we can finish our taxes. Therefore, she been cleaning out a lot of old retirement paperwork.

Thus: Fire

Plus, you know, I shared my winning recipe for powdered cubes. That is all for now.

Chow!

B: Smart!

I should tell you that many banks and credit unions have an online deposit scenario where you can deposit your check by taking a picture of it.

Brian: Whoa! Whoa! Whoa. Don't confuse this Consumer Report Subscriber* with your talk of "online deposit".

Deposit slips were good enough for Abraham and Noah. They are good enough for me.

Yours, Me.

*That is, an old person.

Fri, Apr 10.10:54 AM

Brian: Who invited us to the KM. meeting? I can't find the email.

R: I believe N

B: I'll forward you the email if you want.

R: How do you both feel about Zoom meeting with T for support

B: Sure. Support in what way?

R: He sent an email saying he's willing to zoom with us about our classroom. I just wasn't sure we needed it, but obviously I'm open to it

B: I'm open but I don't wanna zoom just for zoom's sake

Maybe we should because it could either confirm our direction or redirect us.

I plan to post an announcement for our new format in Bloomz this afternoon around 4

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 4

Fri, April 10, 12:45.

B: I wanna do a poetry unit thing. It would be super short each week/ day. Would we have enough time in our 90 minute block to add it? It would be about 30 minutes over the course of the week.

Can we develop a list of the kids who have requested paper packets?  This way we know who is working at home and not in the classroom.

R: I say we add it on Monday then have them submit Friday, that way they can fit it into their schedule. Unless there's a specific day you want to do it

Brian: I have T and LG. I just contacted them since they were still waiting on the ChromeBooks.

J is also a no-show on the Google Classroom but Mom contacted last week saying she was going to homeschool him.

No packet for you!!

B: That's my plan for all the work I put in. I have a virtual reading log going in for their 20 minutes a day.

The poetry wouldn't take very long. I can do it on one of my own weeks later in the year though too. Maybe close to the end of the school year we can do a couple weeks of poetry.

I'll share the doc with you and T so he can see who we have been able to be in contact with.

You're referring to the poetry thing. Assign on Monday and have it due Friday, yes? Have either of you checked the ELA packet?

R: As for science I spent a few hours trying virtual labs and found that they are stand alone, and I’ have to do a lot of preteaching and vocabulary. I kept thinking STEM or engineering but that'd require them to use items at home. If I did it digitally we'd lose arguable one of the most important components which is to improve. Needless to say I'm reworking a mystery science lesson.

B: That works! Mystery Science is pretty great most lo the time.

Brian: B, I don't have access to Star results from your class and R's, Could you look up K's latest results? I have something from January but suspect there is something more up to date.

Hope there's something more up to date.

R: I can look that up as well

Actually, I can't. I'm trying to reset my password because it keeps saying my Renaissance id or password is incorrect.

Brian: That meeting?

R: Shit

Brian: 1:30 meeting?

RE...? Is from special services.

R: No idea

Maybe the middle school  person to talk about life skills

B: Yes. And a reading log for their 15-20 minutes of reading per day.  My meeting video isn't showing up. Just audio

Brian: Well, we can definitely see you wave your arms at S.

B: Lovely

R: It's fine because T had to take his son out of the room because he was jumping on bed

B: I feel better now

Longest zoom ever and I had a lanky screen.

*Blank

Punishment for being late.

R: I've gotta pee

B: Me too

I was legit watching a literacy training video that was super awesome and I forgot to pause it.

Brian: I can finally eat this delicious orange.

R: Holy cow that was just shy of two hours

Brian: I thought there was a 50 minute limit.

R: I'm happy she's slated for Ridgetop because I think she's going to find herself in life skills.

Brian: Yeah, I thought that a  better option for her as well.

R: I just found Winnie on the toilet playing Animal Crossing. How long has she been here? No idea. Is she allowed to even play the switch? I don't even know.

Brian: Many many questions...

B: How do we remove things from the day of the week tab if we aren't done looking at it but they are done working on it. Can we make it "go to sleep" or hide it from view?

Brian: Not sure. I plan to much about with the site over the weekend. Who knows what I'll figure out?

B: Ok. Let me know. With the larger projects I will need more than a weekend to give feedback so I might need to leave them in there until I can do that. R too I think.

R: I don't  know how go to sleep works or if that's even a real option haha

B: If it's not, it should be.

Fri, Apr 10, 7:48 PM

B: I arranged the classroom a little. We can make a topic for past projects where we can move old projects. I think.

I moved a couple assignments from one section to another easily so it should be simple.

Sun, Apr 12, 10:26 AM

B: Happy easter team!! I'm so grateful for you. It's one thing to have people on your team who are easy to work with but a whole nother thang when you can call your team friends and family.

Brian: Hey! You guys rock!

Okay, I have been putting off "getting serious" about school work for waaay too long. Just, sort of assumed everything was cool.

Yesterday was my first BBQ. Went reasonably well once I got it up to about 600 degrees to sterilize everything. That first time opening the lid in spring is NOT for the faint of heart.

When my extremely high heat BBQ gloves started to smolder.. Dang it! Doing it again!

Must. Focus. On. Work. Stuff!

Man I hope we don't have any more IEP meetings On Friday, (was that Friday?) I was so bored after 60 minutes that I started practicing my bass guitar on the down low. Sure wish I'd gotten to that vital 4th lesson before lockdown.

Not like I was contributing anything to the meeting. The ADHD meds can only do so much.

Okay, back to the Google Classroom. David invited me to join the 2nd grade classroom. I went thinking it was all bells and

whistles but nope; just a boatload of assignments.

(CG is the 2nd grade yoga teacher? She's posted a few assignments but so has Anthony.) Arrrgh! Must stop swiping the ChromeBook screen!!

Anyway, GCL still looks plain as hell. Am investigating how to upload a photo; any photo. The one of us is too small. It must be at least 800 pixels by 200 pixels

Maybe I'll drive to CC to take another photo. Something to ponder.

Oh, yeah, go Team 5th Grade! I would be (even more) lost without you!

Happy Easter! Enjoy your celebratory ham, peeps and chewing gum. Gotta go.

Well, poor Ms. W. is supposed to:

"I'm tasked with making sure your work is accessible to all our students, as well as provide some kind of specially designed instruction for rdg, wr, math, social skills, and adaptive for all my students' goals. And, I have to be able to  progress monitor it somehow. What???"

Just not sure what all we can do to help R-Dub with this.

Okay, it took over an hour but I got that bleeping Orca onto the streaming page. Granted, it’s only about 1/2 the Orca and a dark half at that.

Okay, added an assignment for tomorrow: Redbird for 20 minutes.  A stunning accomplishment, I know.

B: I told B that we would level the reading materials so all she needs to do is check it rather than create something new.

Thanks for making ya look good Bri.

Mon, Apr 13, 9:12 AM

B: Are the math assignments going in Bloomz or just the website?

Not Bloomz, the GCL

Brian: Both are posted to the classroom.

B: The lesson 1 isn't in there under Monday

I don't see Lesson 1

Brian: The assignment isn't a particular lesson; it's to practice for X minutes on Redbird and Mobymax. let me check the C-19 doc.

B: Ok. Sorry. Let me change the Bloomz announcement.

Brian: No, this is on me.

I'm still trying to decide whether to continue with the All Review Spring; in which cage I'll start on Ch. 1

Or....

Try to pick up where we left of in March: Fractions and decimals. B's doing fraction/decimal review this week.

Perhaps TT will have some words of inspiration at 10:00.

B: Maybe. I don't count on it though. I think he's gonna give us some freedom. We could google meet with him as a grade level.

Brian: That might be helpful.

B: Ok. I'll email him a request. Do you wanna set it up? I can ask him what time he's available

Brian: Let me check my schedule.

…

I'm pretty much free this, uh, spring. T’s schedule might be busier.

Maybe just see what works for him? And it's possible he’ll clarify things at the Zoom meeting, so I’d like to wait til 11:00 to ask him.

That work?

The Spooky Goat has spoken.

R: I'm alarmed by that

Yeah I'm pretty free as well...it's frightening.

B: Yeah. I'm free too. Except tomorrow. The littles then eight. If you wanna send me a quick little happy birthday video that would be awesome.

R: We do, W and I need to come up with a script.

B: Sweet!

R: Quarantine has us trying to be low maintenance with hats, don't judge we're new here

B: No judgement. I haven't even pulled my hair down from my sleep style.

Brian: I'm judging.

B: Well, we're judging You too goat boy.

So a lot of families aren't seeing the daily announcement for the assignments because Bloomz is glitching, I'm glad we put our days of the weeks topics.

R: Also the video in my slideshow doesn't work which isn't a big deal

B: Sigh. Figures. Lots of tech issues.

R: The problem is they describe everything as teams and handouts, it requires materials and printing. I redid everything because I tried to elongate equity issues

B: We can click and drag assignments from one topic to another. I might click and drag the reading log from one day to the next so they can find it in each day's section

Brian: She said elongate...

R: He he

Brian: Zoom Meeting Scavenger Hunt: How many cats can you spot in the background?

B: How many did you spot.

The question people are my least favorite.

Brian: Just two: Mystery Sam and Shanna.

R: Yes you are!

Brian: So, I'm thinking we should post our office hours on the Classroom?

R: Was that a portrait on the fireplace of two Pomeranians in the background of G’s? That's my question. Can we all just say 8-330 which is basically what we're doing

Brian: What else should we take care of today?

(I'm waiting to hear back from TT about Zooming. That time works,

Yeah, I'm really liking the Orca photo.

B: I'm good with those hours too. I posted them on Bloomz too.

Brian: FYI: Taking a break. Be back in 30.

B: Ok

Brian: Okay!

-had some lunch: Xander brand bread w/English cheddar

-checked in with the wife

-restocked the bird and squirrel feeders

-brought in the now empty garbage can

-near filled same can with all the many garbage bags sitting around the garage

-Started watering the fruit trees

-and now enjoying some delicious gum.

Back to work!

Still haven't heard back from T

Mon, Apr 13, 1:54 PM 

B: Got some light reading.

Brian: Me, too.

B: Which book(s)?

Brian: This monster of a fantasy novel and its two predecessors have taken up most of my past month.

X is also on my audible account and so....accounts! for some of the listening time. His assigned book this week was "The Millionaire Next Door"; which he discovered is in my library.

Curses! Foiled again!

Mon.Apr 13, 3:28 PM

Brian: I am getting up a 2:00 Zoom with T tomorrow. Mostly just want to pick his brain about math stuff but you may have further questions for him.

Futzed about with the classroom and  the C-19 doc.

I'll be honest; not a fan of the classroom layout.

It’s probably due to my using a G-Site for all these years. Classroom just has fewer options. With 10 weeks ahead of me, I'll have plenty of time to become an expert.

It may only be 3:27 but I'm sneaking out of work early. Don't tell anyone. Yabba Dabba Dool!

B: I went on a walk at about 3:20. I had had enough of this inside stuff. I am not used to staying home and the boy child was driving me nuts.

Got home and realized that D's assignments dated today didn't all have to be finished today so the poor boy got wrath without necessarily deserving it.

We'll figure it out. It's foreign ground for everyone and I think we are way more efficient and effective than others. I would appreciate the way we do it more than what I'm seeing from the ones I see.

I can't even find C's stuff. She has to do it. A is on her own completely. Poor kid.

R: Perfect!

I sent  LM’s mom the info about his packet from J. Wonder how many people she's having to track down info for to make sure they get their packets

B: I know she was trying to track down C's mom.

R: I can add my stuff whenever

B: No worries. I just wanted to make sure it's there at some point before I post on Bloomz in the am. I post at about 7:30

R: I get up at 5:40 everyday still I got your back mama

B: Still? Why?

R: I make K lunch and coffee...

Brian: ….. Nope, I got nothing.

R: Awwww.

B: Plus I thought we were going back to work so I just kept my schedule. Now it's part of my routine.

R: Oh my gosh. M’s photo is too cute in the class. I miss our kids

B: I miss M. Not all of them, but she's one of them.

R: So funny I'm giving feedback to all the kids who completed the assignment, I get to A's and she's working on it currently. last questions which is short response. I just gave her some real time help. I could tell she was like "wth" by the movement of her curser and slow backspacing.

B: I LOVE messing with her. It's my favorite.

R: If you comment to students does it notify them when they enter the classroom? Because typically you'd get an email but elementary doesn't have access to that

B: I don't know. I think it shows up when the open they assignment. S and C's teachers don't comment but I can ask A if hers does.

R: I want to give them feedback and things to consider as they go into tomorrow. Me just chose a location to build a well because "water can't travel downhill". They need me

B: I wonder if she's building a well on the moon. You know, where gravity's pull is much weaker.

R: Apparently report cards were received today. S’s parents aren't happy. I'll deal with it tomorrow, but I'm thinking a lot of our parents aren't going to happy with their students’ performances.

Brian: All these texts are distracting me from James Bond’s awesomeness.

Baby's going in the Office.

Goodnight.

Tue, Apr 14, 6:51 AM

R: I'm a little upset so many parents want packets when I know their students have access to internet. I truly believe they would get more from doing our projects and assignments then the work packets.

B: Every person that asked for one that is in the classroom, I warned that the packets are for people who don't have internet access and that are not going to do the online work. a few backed out and didn't want one after that.

R: I know :-/ Thanks for doing that though!

B: Maybe they think the packets would be easier. I checked out the reading one and it's substantial. They would benefit from not doing it.

Brian: Can't say the same for the math guide.

So, I'm at work now and have checked the kids fact fluency progress.

S and K both worked on theirs last night. I'd like to send them attaboys (attagirls?) but since MobyMax is an external website, how do I do that? The kids’ emails don't work for email, correct? I could mark their assignments as complete but that's not very specific.

R: Elementary doesn't have the ability to email.

Brian: so I just sent a reminder about math homework to the 30 or so kids who didn't Redbird yesterday. It LOOKS like it was sent successfully but you are saying the kids won't get it?

 ...

Ha ha. My inbox in now chock full of "Delivery status Notification (failure)". That answers my question. I’ll just need to do whole group comments on the G-Classroom page?

B: I will also post on Bloomz about kids doing Redbird. Do you want them on there again today?

Brian: Yep. 20 more minutes.

I'll get up earlier  tomorrow to update things.

R: Do we have preferences about next year's camp dates?

Brian: Whatever they have.

B: Nope.

Do either of you happen to know the dates of our next spring break?

Brian: April 5-9th

B: Awesome. Thank you

And not to brag or anything but my pest control guy just showed up to get rid of our spiders. Because I am adulting the hell out of life right now.

R: Mom used to pay a pes1 control for spiders until he told her that his "warranty" doesn'1 cover spiders.

B: I don't know if they warranty it or not but I know we can call them back at any point between treatments and they will respect for free.

Respect

Re-spray

Brian: spiders?

Wendi is on the "Hlubby Takes Care Of Them" plan.

Tue, Apr 141 2:02 PM

R: You setting up the meeting Bri?

Brian: Invite on the way.

R: Email?

Brian: From T.

R: Shoot. I'm on my way

Wed, Apr 15, 6:34 AM

R: Just got invited to W's classroom from Pl.

Holy cow. It's 5 videos lo start your morning off everyday then a document for the entire week to view after the videos. Straight up we've streamlined it and made it so nice for parents and families.

Go team!

B: I agree. Our way is the best way.

Brian: Yea, us!

Mrs. J. has quite the glamour shot on her email account! Just saying.

R: Speaking of which I need to update mine

Brian: Well, I wasn't going to say anything but...

B: Mine looks like a B movie headshot. I need to update mine too.

Do you two have a preference for what communication platform we use? I like Bloomz but Dojo and Remind are on the table.

Brian: The Bloomz interface is ass; at least on this ChromeBook but the parents have been using forever.  I suspect the transition over to something else would be more trouble than it's worth.

B: We are talking about a whole school communication system.

Believe it or not, Bloomz is easier to maneuver on the phone app not the computer. That's not usually true, but with Bloomz it is.

I hate Dojo so  I hope we don't go that route.

R: Dojo I don't love because I don't want to do all the other business and parents might expect us to use those behavior features. Remind is straight forward and sterile so that's fine with me. I do like bloomz though

B: Remind is like Twitter. As a parent it's just for assignments. Like you said, super sterile.

R: Exactly

Brian: So, is this decision being made right now? Like, we all have to decide this week? Again, you gotta dance with them that brought ya.

I will try putting Bloomz onto my iPad. What's the username/password?

B: It's your email I believe.

I don't think so. I think they are planning for next year.

Brian: Hey, is there anyway to post photos or videos to Bloomz?

I think S has earned at least 1 Screaming Goat for finishing his fact fluency. I, uh, MAY have too much time on my hands.

R: Announcements I believe can post videos

The one thing I'm hearing from parents is too many emails between schools and all the teachers. I say the classroom is a more appropriate place for that and motivational for the students

B: The classroom is where students can see it and Bloomz is mostly parents. So just know the audience for our comments and things.

Brian: Okay, I'll post these thrilling results on our classroom.

Aarrgh!! I just saw a Parent comment on Classroom about Redbird being checked off. And now I can't find the comment again.

HULK SMASH!!

Can you help me out?

B: I'm in an SLT so  when it's done I'll check it out. It might be under an announcement rather than a post.

R: I don't see a comment but I do see that L "turned in", Which L?

I didn't see a comment and GC sends me emails that vibrate my phone, maybe because I didn't make the assignment?

Brian: Could be?

Crud. Found it. Never mind.

Wed, Apr 15, 5:15 PM

B: Have either of you gotten a stimulus check yet? I keep seeing people post about getting their checks...

Brian: Nope.

I assume we'll be direct deposit. The holdup is probably President Dumb-Ass insisting on signing all the direct deposit checks.

B: Just wondering. We didn't file in 2019 so I wonder if we will be later than other folks.

R: I got mine yesterday and same with K, we both bank with KCU. My sisters got theirs today and they bank with Chase. Not sure if that's a factor.

B: I don't think banking matters. Did you file in 2019? For 2019

Brian: Yep.

B: Ok. Just trying to plan stuff. We are hoping to give J's mom some $ to pay her car payment

Thu, Apr 16, 12:00 PM

B: I did the Imagine Learning training today. I am zooming with the lady who   loads the rosters later today so I can get all three homeroom a into my roster. Once I get that done, I can start communicating to families about it and assigning it in classroom.

Brian: Sounds good. Still no math component?

R: That's awesome. Thank you for doing that!

Brian: Oh, yeah. Yippee for the Beck!

B: No math. Redbird is for math. This is just like Redbird for ELA

Brian: Both Wendi and Xander feel the need to update me on their daily progress. All. The. Time.

And now Wendi has turned on M.C. Hammer again.

You can't actually be arrested for breaking into your own workplace, can you?

B: Oh my word! J narrates every flipping thing too!!! And so does S. A would be my favorite except she's Uber moody and cries when she has to work hard.

All that being said, C is my favorite.

Thu, Apr 16, 6:31 PM

B: Are we keeping track of everybody who is turning stuff in? We can take old assignments and create a new topic (past assignments) and put them there so we have a record. It'll just add up quite a bit as we go.

R: Good idea!

B has sent me two messages via A's email and had no idea about our new google classroom. Today he asked me if he has to do

everything from this week because today is his first day logging in. Mind you his entire message was in the subject

B: I think they can see the grades page if they are looking over their child's shoulder.

We can't cut down the stream unless we cut down the Classwork tab. I never even look at the stream. Ever.

Are we moving the day that's current to the top of the Classwork page? Someone did and I liked it so I made Friday be at the top.

I can rearrange it back to Monday at the top over the weekend. I'll add a past activities topic too and move old stuff down there so we have a record of everything. I wish they had a way of hiding things from the kids so they won't see it but we will.

Thu, Apr 16, 9:58 PM

Brian: Just to be sure, students or their parents can see all 4 pages of the classroom?

The stream is ghastly but it's the first thing that I see. You all just make a habit of ignoring page one? B, what time does tomorrow's Bloomz go out?

Fri, Apr 17, 6:21 AM

R: It's like your Facebook wall. I know our 5th graders aren't getting caught up on every single announcement. They know the routine. They go straight to classwork. As for grades. I make everything I do ungraded. That moans instead of a score they get a check mark.

Brian: Okay, if this makes the daily edition, great. If not, I'll send it out Thursday  evening.

Great Job with math this week! On the Moby Max guide, some of the MANY highlights include King Tut Badges being earned by S, E, and S. Baseball badges by K and M. But most impressive were both B and B completing five (5!) MM lessons by Thursday evening.

Over in Redbird world, many students: A,N,S,T, M completed an impressive 3 lessons this week but the Crown of Mathyness goes to J for successfully finishing 4 lessons this week.

Again, great job and let's have an even better next week!

P.S. No idea what a King Tut badge is… Sounds pretty impressive.

And I better start working on the Crown of Mathyness.  Silver. Should probably start with silver.

B: I wonder if it's like a resurrection badge. Come alive!!!!!

Brian: Now even I would do Moby Max for that!

B: Me too.

R: Hey Brian, J and M both left comments about not knowing which quiz to do and where to go for MyMath quiz. I'd help but I don't actually know anything about that website

Brian: Yeah, me neither. I'll take a look.

Thx

It's %#€£ dieappeared!!

R: It could be worse.  N's mom messaged me saying that the math teacher sent out a reminder to do meth everyday for 30 minutes

Brian: Meth everyday? That seems excessive.

R: We're doing good team

B: Meth will definitely keep her productive.

I have two teacher fears..

The first is the I will make KOMONews, Kitsap Sun and/or FB by posting something like "Let's do 30 minutes of meth every day! Congratulations to J for being our Best Meth Worker!" Something to that effect.

The second is that I am intently drawing a math diagram on the white board or document camera when I notice the increasing titters of laughter from the students. (And visiting principals-'cause why not?)

When I stop drawing to find the cause of the laughter, I notice I have accidentally drawn something that looks very much like a penis.

That nightmare scenario plays (way) in the back of my mind pretty much every day of school.

And I know I would need to resign that very day....

Welcome to Brian's mind !

B: Ha haaaa!!

Brian: Oh, sure! I am being completely unreasonable....

B: You see what you wanna see...

Brian: I just updated T’s spreadsheet.

B: Thank you.

M said he can't find the quiz in My Math

I tried the link and it goes straight to the CKSD website. Is that where you wanted it to go?

Brian: Is THAT the problem? The boneheads have to log into their CK accounts and then go to ConnectED. Just like we practiced.

R: How sweet is this?!

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 5

Sun, Apr 19, 6:15 PM

Brian: At the risk of being, well, a lazy son of a gun, might we spend this week focusing on getting Image Learning up and running?

I know it's not for everyone but I am hesitant about starting more than one new thing per week....

OR could we assign it to everyone?

R: They are all on my Imagine Learning roster so they can easily do that and no math. The struggle is going to be getting them all into it, I think T drafted an email and a slide show that will walk them through getting in. It's likely gonna take a while so assigning it might be a good idea. Monday can be just logging in and taking the placement test.

Brian: Whoa, whoa, whoa! What's this craziness about "no math"?

I am just saying I don't want to introduce anything new besides I.L.

B: I have a big project about the colonies I'm introducing. If we wanna do IL AND that it might be a lot...

Let me get the slide show and stuff together for logging into IL and we can ease them into it this week and go whole hog next week.

R: I was going to have them do two short responses using RACE for short Mystery Science videos this week, but after seeing your colonies slideshow I feel like that's a lot of short response,

I'm totally down with exploring IL and seeing how it can best assist all of us.

B: Yeah. I did put a lot in there. t can shorten it. I'll look at it again.

The from what I learned it is all language arts. It varies from grammar and usage to vocabulary to maze to literature and nonfiction. It depends on their placement test, It's like Redbird for ELA. It goes with their skills. Very little management is needed on our part except for looking at their reports. I had them all put into my roster because I thought you guys wouldn't want to have to manage it. I can give you my login and password though if you wanna have a gander.

R: I'm not asking you to do that! I'm just saying I have science filler if you need for two days, but again don't want to overload.

B: Ok. I have them doing the slide show and reading log with a response this week. Bri, what do you have planned,

Mon, Apr 20, 8:20 AM

Brian: Is RACE on ckschools bookmark page

R: Race is an acronym

Restate question in answer

Answer question

Cite evidence

Explain your answer

Unless you're talking about something different...

B: Yeah that

R: It's for responding with a short answer.

Brian: Learn something new every day.

Mon, Apr 20, 9:29 AM

B: 9am Monday and J turned a week long project. It was crap. Not a single complete sentence. I'm not looking forward to the feedback I am going to have to give.

R: Quantity not quality. Interesting choice.

B: Yeah. I commented the heck out of it and returned it. Nice try J.

So C somehow deleted the entire slide show so I had to reassign it to him. It'll show two colony projects in each day but it won't show two for the kids.

R: Sweet C

B: Yeah, Sweet boy.

Brian: Ha ha...

Tue, Apr 21, 11:02 AM

Brian: Can I use D as a test subject?

I want to log in as a student to see what they're seeing. Since D got a packet, I'm thinking he won't be doing anything online?

B: Sure. Do it.

Would you be ok with me alternating IL and RB/MM in the Bloomz announcements? MWF I will post minutes for MM/RB and TTh I will post minutes for IL. That way it's scheduled out for families. I think they're getting confused when we let them manage it in a general way.

Brian: Yeah, I'm getting that vibe also. I wonder if just a Monday RB/MM announcement would be enough for the week. Fun Fact: I'm alternating between my ChromeBook and iPad to do my schoolwork here at the home office.

I have poked my ChromeBook's screen at least 10 times so far today.

B: Fun-Ny fact.

We could post it as a weekly generalization but I suspect that it won't get done past Monday. Families are very used to a daily task list so if it's not in there, it may not get done.

R: W's always trying to touch screen everything too, so I get it

Fun Fact: I've ditched pre-k's online resources because I'd rather read to her than have scholastics read two books. I also got her a workbook...now her teacher wants to conference about how it's going but I've gone rouge!

Brian: You've gone "a red powder or cream used as a cosmetic for coloring the cheeks or lips"? Freaky...

R: That's right. Full face rouge

Brian: B, it may be time for a Zoom intervention.

B: Maybe. She can't use her phone though because the screen cracked.

R: It's getting fixed today people!!! Apparently Apex is an essential business *shakes head*

B: So are pot shops. And Dutch bro's. Who would've figured.

R: Still haven't gone to Target...! miss it. Finally just placed an online because I'm out of concealer.

Brian: Oh, she's going concealer!

B: I have done the Target pickup a couple times. It's awesome.

Tue, Apr 21, 2:09 PM

Brian: Dang it. How do you send private messages on Bloomz?

R: Click messages then click the image of +message

Brian: Yeah, but will this message get posted? I don't want everyone knowing that D's packet can just go into the dumpster.

R: Not if you go through the messages, those are private. You just need to leave the updates page to do that. Brian: Okay. Cool. Thx.

Wed, Apr. 22, 10:14 AM

B: Comments on every project? Yay or nay?

I did for the reading log but these Colony projects take longer. I have next week too but I wanna make sure they get timely responses.

R: I say no, unless they need the feedback

Brian: Yeah, the Js of the world might need it but probably not everyone.

B: Ok.

R: I'm having some anxieties about this meeting lasting two hours like the last one...

Brian: We can all just freeze in place at the designated time. If we're really good at it, they'll just assume our ChromeBooks died.

B: Maybe if we head it off with "I have about an hour only"

I'll text B too with request that it be short if possible. Two hours is too long. I spent two hours staring at a screen with no faces. That was hell.

R: I think it was because ii was the re-evaluation and IEP meeting all in one, but that's like excessive wi1h no escape for 8 people especially.

B: True.

R: If it's over an hour I'm all for Brian's freeze tactic

B: I'm down Yes

C has three google meets with her class per week. Per week! Are we being relationship neglectful? I don't feel it in my heart but she seems to really enjoy these random chats.

R: Okay I'm going to quickly vacuum the upstairs then.

How do you even manage that? I've heard from some of the girls in the beginning and they were reaching out to one another FaceTiming and texting. 2nd graders usually don't have access to that...plus I'd probably try to control ii and listening to 80 kids seems excessive

B: I would do homeroom only and what I overhear from C and S's meets is just everyone talking at the same time or B trying to talk over everyone asking  a specific question. A's meets remind me of a college class.

Brian: My heart's an empty hole, my brain is full of spiders and I've got garlic in my soul go I'll just take your lead on the touchy­ feely stuff

B: A's teacher is doing a show and tell. She is not excited about it. That's what I'm afraid meeting up with tweens would turn into.

I might put it out there as a Bloomz message to my homeroom kids and see if anyone is interested.

R: Hmmm, maybe we should all host a Google Hangout al the same time so we can streamline the message. After we do one we'll probably have to do one a week moving forward which is manageable

Brian: Just take comfort in the fact that during this upcoming long-ass Zoom meeting, I'll be Dedicated Math Teacher from the sternum up BUT...

Rock God Just SHREDDING Those Two Chords from the sternum down!

Sort of our version of a mullet.

And for THAT unseeable image, you Ladies, are welcome!

R: Something about zoom meetings make me yawn, so I'll be fighting that urge for the entire time.

B: Oh Bri! I am dressed up for the waist up and rocking my house pants like no other. I'm also aiming my camera at the only semi-decently clean corner of my house.

My kids are just moving and making messes far too often.

Brian: Shredding, I say.

Is that keyboard  made out of bricks?

Remember, no yawning.

R: Trying

Brian: Best to not even think about it. All this talking is making me tired.

R: Me giving the bird

Brian: B's off camera

Wanna bet that's what TT's doing?

R: He's def yawning

Brian: Most Def. RR's fading....

R: Getting started in general is tough....

Brian: Must...not...yawn...

R: Apparently A's parents sent me a message late Friday night I didn't see asking for a packet. OOPS

B: Oh well. You can still order for the next round I think. And don't be jelly. I can hear where I am. Blu tooth!!!

R: It's frustrating because all of these students have internet access and have been on the computer. Oh well.

Anyone remember what the doc was called

Brian: It's hard to be in any way enthusiastic about them. The packets; not A’s parents.

B: It's a form. I'll forward you T's email.

R: Found It!

Brian: OMGoodness! It's already past noon!

I going to spend some time investigating composting.

R: But the grade level folders only have 4 pages, 2 handouts. Am I missing something?

B: What is that1 I never go there. The packet they handed out is like 50 pages or something.

R: I found the ELA one

Brian: That site you posted above? Just scroll down.

R: I'm going crazy

Brian: BTW: You want your Brown layers and Green layers, well, layered in your compost heap. Like a lasagna.

The more you know...

B: How do you layer it? Like frosting on a cake but with really well timed trash?

Brian: Alternate between the moist (green) and the dry(brown). So a layer of food scraps, coffee grounds, grass clippings and then a layer of dead leaves, wood chips, hay, fireplace ashes.

Sadly, it might take ag long as 6 months before you get that first shovelful of the sweet, sweet, soil.

R: Should have gotten composting worms...

My only misstep is I didn't see the email they sent on Friday at 7pm asking for a packet...the ones handed out on the 14th and 16th. I hate when parents are upset with me

Brian: And of course, you'll want to avoid adding lard, animal feces, or dairy products,

R: You should probably also avoid meats. And sugars.

Brian: Oh, so NOW everyone's an expert, hm?

R: I promote global warming, Brian

Brian: 5 Points to House R!

Thu, Apr 23, 7:25 AM

B: I am seeing bold and highlighted text in the Covid doc. Not sure what it means exactly. What's the "snapshot"?

R: I'm updating it today with details about the rover...but that's the only thing I started and it's next week

Brian: It’s a way for parents (or kids) to check on the kid's progress from home. I just emailed you A's so you can get an idea.

B: Ahhh. Ok. Nice.

What do you think about the minutes? Post them daily or just once as a weekly guideline?

Brian: I'm leaning towards a weekly total.

B: I can do that but I'll likely post daily to work towards the weekly total.

I like the snapshot but a couple things: we need to make sure parents know what they're looking at, The legend is a super small drop down menu at the top and easy to miss. Also, we might wanna point out that free play isn't a good thing.

Brian: C addressed all of these points in the accompanying Redbird video she made

B: Are we counting on families to watch the video? I would prefer a bulleted "look for" list as a parent than a video but that's just me.

Brian: Are you claiming our parents wouldn't watch the materials we provide?!? Fine. I will add some bulleted points.

B: I am saying that,

Thank you. Watching videos that are longer than one or two minutes in a house with three kids who all want help and a job to do just doesn't happen in this house so I'm assuming it won't happen in other homes either.

Brian: I mean, I thought I did all that with my brilliant "Redbird Snapshot" essay BUT Be must have her bullet points. You want points? Oh, I'll give you points!!

Can just drop this new message into a newly created Bloomz post and send it to all the parents?  (Look at me, being all technical!)

Sigh...D's Dad is seemingly not a fan of the District's "NoTakeBackSeas" packet plan.

B: Ooh! Getting fancy are ya? Do it! Make that post! Own it!

I'm not sure what he wants us to do. Maybe reminding him that accepting hundreds of paper packets from hundreds of different homes may not be the safest approach during a pandemic.

Although that is exactly what North Kitsap is doing

Brian: Have they figured out what the long  term plan for distributing packets is going to be?

B: I think it's an every two week distribution at the meal drop offs.

Brian: This stupid, stupid survey Dr. Prince just never ends!!! And it won't close!

B: It won't close? I just x’d out. I made it to 64.

Brian: 143 for me.

B: Wow! I salute you.

Brian: Screw it.

Though I would like to share my concerns about this stinking survey, it’s probably best I just pull the plug.

B: Pull it!

Brian: Okay, added some bulleted points Ready to be Bloomzed.

Thu, Apr 231 12:15 PM

B: HOW many parents will be asking us how to print off the eBook? I know I got a few the other day.

Brian: It's not a tidal wave; just a steady drip. Of cluelessness.

B: Yeah. If I can help when I post the daily directions, let me know how.

R: looks like T is once again pushing island wood

B: Island wood is so  crazy expensive. Super expensive. It was like $300+  per kid. I don't know why he would  push it. It's also much less fun from what I've heard.

R: I went as a 6th grader, can vouch. So much academics. The lodges were legit though.

B: Hmm mm. Maybe we should go just for the lodging

R: Heated cement flooring people

B: I am a fan of the heart of the Y. They are so community oriented and I don't like going private elite camp.

R: I like the Y because it's fun with a side of academics. I agree with the community aspect and our kids need that.

If we're going to switch let it lo be Seymore because it's 15 min closer

B: I wanna support the Y rather than some snobby Bl organization.

R: Suspension bridge isn't that great and floating Classroom was a snooze fest. I'm the yelp of Camp now

Fri, Apr 24, 12:04 PM

Brian: Not sure my first attempt at pickling eggs will be all that great. I'll know by Sunday.

B: looks yummy…

Brian: By the end our 8th or 9th month of lockdown, you'll be wishing you had treated my eggs with a bit more reverence.

B: Probably.

R: I'm fascinated. You still working on your super dry energy bars?

Brian: I am about 1/2 through the bag.

B: Throw them out Bri. Just throw them out.

You've got eggs to eat,

You know what1 I just remembered that when I was in CA in November my uncle gave me one of his pickled eggs and I loved it - His was spicy.

Brian: Uncle Bri’s Spicy Eggs Accept no substitute!

Just finished planting the lavender. Wish I had done so at least a month back.

Grow fast little plants! My apple trees are counting on your pollinator attracting flowers.

...Yeah, if the plants do grow, they'll probably flower by early to mid-June.

B: Can you hand pollinate them1 I have a friend that does that. I can probably find her video explaining it... He he

Brian: I have started attempting that but bees are best

B: Bees ARE best. Let's hope the cleaner air will get them out and about.

R: Just got a voicemail from SS. (I accidentally gave her my number on a field trip 5 years ago). They have completely halted CB distribution right?

It was a weird voicemail saying she doesn't want to send an email and won't qualify based on the Google Form... I don't think the district will give an additional one when her other 3 kids have one from the district.

Brian: Yes, tired of fielding ChromeBook questions. If only someone in the District was in charge of this. Someone NOT us,

Of more urgency, B, have you sent out Google Classroom invites to B&B?  They're waisting their time by not working for us.

Wasting. They are doing that, too.

B: I sent a Bloomz invite to B but not google classroom,

R: Are we doing a weekly kudos announcement. I've got my list of high IL achievers ready to go!

Brian: The Shadows, Rockstars, and Huskies continue to amaze in  math. Among many Moby Max accolades this week, B and A earned their Chicken ltza badges, C, his NSI badge and D earned 100% on Tuesday's math lesson. Finally, A made the most progress with his fact fluency.

On the Redbird Ride, the Shadows, Rockstars, and Huskies demonstrated mathematical proficiency with 12., 32., and

34 lessons respectively.

This week's MATHY CROWN of MATHYNESS goes to S for completing eight (8!) lessons during week!

What badges will be awarded next week?

Who will win the Mathy Crown of Mathyness? Tune in next week!

B: This is good. I'm gonna just bite on your game show prowess and add mine to the beginning.

R: Maths Crown of Mathyness, I like that. Makes me want to compete for it

Brian: It's hard to compete with a MATHY Crown.

B: Heck's yeah. I would love a Mathy crown.

Brian: I should probably come up with a drawing or something. I'll bet JB. could come up with something.

…

B had similar thoughts about the fines but texted them to me directly. (Not sure why.)

R: The fines make me mad. How about refund people and then send them an email reminding them of the fine so they can use the money they just got to pay it if they can.

Brian: You want me to pass along our concerns to T? How about our union rep?

B: Your email to T earlier was awesome.

Brian: Okay, I'll leave B's name off it.

B: You can put mine on there.

And R’s.

R: It was his draft, I think you send that message because it's clear we've talked it over then let him act on it. I also stand behind my name being there

Brian: Last chance to say "halt", RR.

R: Onward

Team 5 *air-live*

B: Toby emailed us back

Brian: Yeah. Really meant to change that subject line.

B: Oh my word!!!

Watch the superintendents presentation in her email. Correct me if I'm wrong but 5th grade band is dead

Brian: Oh, that’s terrible.

B: Is that sarcasm? Or are legit sad?

Brian: Mwhahaha!!!!!

An extra 40 minute& of teaching!!!

B: Oh whew! I didn't wanna cheer if you really will miss it. I am NOT sad about it moving to middle school.

Brian: You know what we're not gonna worry about next year?

Those #%€£ing musical instruments!

Three Band/Orchestra concerts? Ba-Bye!!,

“Hello! This is Mr. T. Sorry for the interruption! Can we get a 5th grade teacher to supervise the loud, rude band students stampeding through the halls?"

“Oh, wait! There ARE no more band students? Hmm. Must be Mrs H’s kids then. Never mind.”

We'll be able to leave out selections of beer in the Staff Room because it will ONLY be a Staff Room right now!

R: No more hot cross buns!! No more Star Wars songs that we can't recognize!

Brian: Goodbye "Ode to Joy!!" Well, "Ode to Persistence."

…

You are wicked people.

B: WE are wicked.

A just said that the fifth graders that come into band as sixth graders suck anyway so it won't matter if they get fifth grade classes -

Although, selfishly, I am glad A got some percussion experiences in fifth because she loves it now.

Sunday, Apr 26, 3:21 PM

Brian: Just spent three (3!) hours Screencastifying my first twelve (12) minute math lesson for tomorrow’s G-CR

Ugh.

This may shock you but I LOATHE listening to myself.. And Tanith decided to start meowing at about minute 11....

B: I hate listening to myself too.

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 6

Sun, Apr 261 8:50 PM

B: Are you two posting your assignments into the classroom yourselves?

R: Like on Monday? Yes, I always do

B: Yeah. I just updated the classroom with the dates and stuff.

R: Will post about 6:10 tomorrow! Bedtime

Mon, Apr 27, 8:37 AM

Brian: I put D's name on the Packet Request Form 4.28.20.

We have to do ANOTHER request for all those kids?!?!

R: I think every two weeks...

B: Yeah. We have to do a request EVERY TWO WEEKS1!?! Why can't they automatically assume those who picked them up will be coming back? Sigh.

R: And give just an option for kids to be added

Brian: In T's staff Mtg. Monday email, he wrote "This time, you will place names of students on this Google spreadsheet by Tuesday.."

R: What is the name of the one we created originally? We can copy and paste that

B: Would you be ok if I strayed from social studies a bit and ventured  into  narrative writing techniques? The next colony thing I wanted to do involved descriptive writing but they definitely don't have those skills at the forefront of their minds right now.

Brian: Sounds good. I think it’s important to change the lineup now and then.

B: I want to put more reading passages in it too. Not everyone is turning in reading logs...

R: For sure! Creative liberties are yours. Trying gizmos this week...praying it'll work out with minimal difficulties

B: I hope it does I relied heavily on them and Mystery Science last year because I didn't like the laborious kits. The kids seemed to like them.

You have to live and learn. This whole thing doesn't make any sense instructionally. A has been listening to a screencastify of her social studies teacher for a really long time.

It's really boring

Brian: On a different note, it looks like A's mom or dad sent a Bloomz message to me about math 40 minutes ago but then was deleted at 9:14. I assume they did the deleting?

B: I'm assuming they did.

Brian: Now I'm all curious about what A wanted.

B: Probably couldn't figure out how to watch the screencastify or something.

Brian: Just a bit of warning.

Just spent a whole 17 minutes watching how to loom your best at a Zoom meeting AND I'm rocking the 3 Wolves t-shirt. You ladies might want to turn on the "Too Sexy To Concentrate" filter.

As I said, you have been warned.

Dammit! "Look your best"!

I don't know how to loom.

B: Looming would be awesome.

Brian: Now that I've conquered pickling and composting, maybe looming should be my next project.

B: I fully support that.

R: N has a baby on her lap. How cute!

B: Is your womb aching!

R: 150%

Brian: Uh, Mine, too!

B: Ok. Have one. I wanna be an old auntie to a cute little baby. You're too old to birth Bri.

Brian: Ouch!

B: Sorry. I am too. We're in that club together. I see no baby.

R: It's like 16-18 months for sure

B: I don't see it

R: Well next summer is probably a prime time for baby baking, stay tuned team!

Brian: Guess we're not getting any $ for next year.

B: Sounds like it.

Brian: That’s Camille and a cat. Not a baby.

No yawning, RR!

R: You can't see me!

Brian: You just THINK I can't see you.  Spooky!!

B: Creeper

Brian: Dang, lots of positions getting axed.

R: People can't know I'm eating W's cereal

B: I saw a petition trying to keep band and strings in elementary. Needless to say I did not sign it nor did I comment. You'd be proud.

I wonder what a three way split would be without band and strings?

Brian: A petition where?

B: On Facebook. It's lame.

It was from a fifth grade teacher at CO or WO

R: Get out

Brian: A FB petition. The definition of useless

R: A teacher?! Is she the band or strings teacher?

B: No. She's a fifth grade teacher. She doesn't departmentalize. She also has a sweet time of first thing in the morning.

R: Brian's face when T says thick just made my week

B: I wanna change who I'm looking at. How do I do that? I can't see Brian and T at the same time but I can see the lunch lady

Brian: I wonder that also. Maybe pinning the video?

R: I have you guys on speaker view so I can watch my teams reaction

B: When I do speaker view I get a giant T

My arm up is me describing B’s view. How does she do selfie angle for zoom?!

Brian: Tripod?

R: Probably because her husband C lives in Texas and she video chats him That's why she has one is what I meant

B: Ah. Clever. I feel ill-suited.

I'm so snarky. The first thing I thought of was "of course C will be part of it"

R: The first thing I thought was "cool another team of exactly the same people".

B: Yep. Except L. She isn't usually part of the team.

R: I appreciate that J has a soft spot for social emotional so she goes for those teams, but why a hand in every pot? I'm going to take your advice B, hit those stipends hard my final 5 years

B: J is a go getter. So is C. I feel like J's focus is mostly in one area whereas C is every stinking where.

Ok. My snarky petty attitude is done.

R: Is there anything we may specifically want for next year? I'm looking at the PTA Grant email.

B: I used to ask for a science grant to dissect. We would get $250. We don't have to use it to dissect but we could use it for field trips or something.

Brian: Can't think of anything I might need for math. Maybe Clorox wipes…

Did I say "Clorox"? I meant "Lorox wipes" They are much better!

Mon, Apr 27,l:57 PM

B: Just FYI, D turned in a reading log. So did A!!!

Brian: Whoo-hoo! Let’s hear it for shelter in place!!

Tue. Apr 28, 11:31 AM

Brian: We just have the L. meeting today at 1:30, correct?

B: That's all I know of.

Brian: I am currently working on 3 different screens trying to write out problems directly onto the MyMath lesson  presentations slides.

L. 1 looked like a preschooler worked on it. My goal for L.112 is first grader-level.

Darn you, Salman Khan, darn you and your magical ways!!

B: Can you just use Khan?

Brian: The kids are used to the MyMath slides so I'd like to use them. Might add Khan links as a supplement. What I really need is my Interactive White Board. You think maybe T could pick that up for me?

B: That would be awesome! Maybe he would ... So what if.... We kept a three way departmentalization for next year? We have extra time since the band and strings is gone...

Shall I play with a schedule?

R: My vote is OBVIOUSLY to keep departmentalizing.

Brian: Were we considering not going departMENTAL? (see what I did there?)

B: We talked about it. T was against the three way for a while. I see what you do there.

Brian: he he....

you said three way...

B: I knew you were gonna go there,

Brian: Off-topic.

I am currently reading "The Siege of Gibraltar" which is just what it says. Seems while those pesky Rebels were fighting to leave the British Empire, the Spanish were attempting to get Gibraltar back from the British. Ended up being the longest siege in English history.

Makes me feel  slightly better about my situation; not currently having to survive off moldy hardtack and rain water for 3 years.

At least not yet.

Maybe another go with "The Martian" after that. Now Mark Watney had something to complain about.

Yes he does. That book was torture.

I just finished Just Mercy and I have to say I am so happy I'm not African American and living in the south. My privilege became more apparent with each page.

Tue, Apr 28, 3:38

Brian: Oh yeah, oh yeah! Already posted Wednesday's assignment!!  (Tomorrow's Wednesday, right?)

B: Yessir.

Wed, Apr 29, 9:22 AM

Brian: The age old question. Are we off on the packet count?

Personally, I don't give a hoot if we're giving out "excess" work; what else is the print shop doing with its time?

However, since we just got a T robo-call and an email, I was wondering if we can chuck a couple names off the list.  Seems the Higher Ups are breathing down Mr. T's neck. He doesn't need that.

Where is the student Status form mentioned above? I can't find it.

R: When I have L, A, A, and several other parents who are firm on a packet yet have their kids login to the classroom every once in awhile I'm going to still give them a packet. I know they're supposed to only be for kids without internet access, however these parents have been consistent with wanting one and using it.

Plus wasn't it announced at our meeting they won't exceed 10 pages per subject? They're def saving on printing in our district at this time and can handle our 20 5th grade packets.

Brian: Agreed, just give the parents what they want but it sure seems the TT is anxious to keep our numbers down. Admin's gotta administrate.

R: Honestly I think all the kids have access to internet. Even phone carriers are giving away extra data so you can provide "hot spots" in your household for free. I'm not sure how we're supposed to pare down the list...

B: I'm not sure either because there's a whole bunch of kids NOT in the classroom or doing anything online but are on the list for the packets. We haven't heard from them but they need something! S, E, B, etc.

I can message A and C's moms to see if they still want a packet.

R: Did you guys already send the email? Maybe I can just do a nice little copy and paste to these friends

B: I messaged in Bloomz. It was literally, "since your child is working online, will you still need a paper packet?"

R: Quick and down to business, I like it.

Brian: Update: Scurvy is really taking a toll on the British defenders. Warne, Morocco has been bribed into closing trade with Gibraltar. Even wine and tobacco is becoming scarce.

I am very concerned about the outcome.

Ugh! “Are becoming…”

B: Now that band and strings is done, we can have 90 minute sections.

R: Love that.

Maybe I can also do a full on small group to assist

B: Sure. With 90 minutes I can get more small groups in too.

Intervention groups are 30 so that leaves me with 60 minutes of class time and I can get a whole group lesson, and small group lessons and vocabulary in that time. Can I cross off E?

Brian: Haven't heard back from his mom yet. Cross him off anyway?

B: I crossed him off.

Brian: Hardcore.

Wed, Apr 29, 2:52 PM

Brian: Well, mom got back to me saying he's been working online and doing the packet. She would like to continue with both. Should I tell her to contact T?

This pizzashit ChBk/Bloomz combo means mom sent the message at 10:48.

I just got it now.

R: Well the packet form he said he was going to submit at noon...

Upon request I'm going to do a Google Hangout on Friday. Between B and S I’m convinced I need to try

B: I haven't done it yet. Maybe I'll do one too. Just to hang out with the kiddos.

Brian: Hang out and do...?

Seriously, what gonna happen during this time?

B: I'm assuming they will all talk to each other. They may not need ya much.

Brian: No experience with Go-HO.

Can attendees speak directly to others or will it be just whom ever shouts the loudest?

B: Pretty much whoever shouts the loudest.

Brian: Sounds delightful. Does the host(ess) at least have The Power of The Mute? Reading S's post again, he's kinda pushy; though in a polite way.

Oh, MAY I join in?? At a time of your choosing? You're too kind. Thank you.

Grumpy Old Man Hardy

B: I don't think so. B is really good at leading hers. She asks each kid a question and then they take turns answering. She tells kids to mute themselves when they get too loud

R: I'm going to do a google hangout tomorrow at noon. Anyone else want to attempt one. I was going to post instructions and guidelines on the classroom so the kids have 24 hour notice.

B: Perfect. I'll do one too. We have to come up with a code right? Mine will be Shadows51. Can you put that in your directions?

R: Ooohhhhh mine will be Rockstars51

B: Pretty please foxy mama

R: Nooooo, it says don't until right before you host! I'll post it in class comments  Omg

B: I think it's ok to post the code. B posts hers on Sunday for the whole week.

R: Okay I will. If Brian doesn't want to we can always have huskies split into one of our classes codes

B: Sure. Brian has had a lot more technology things to deal with this week. Let his kids just join us if they want.

Unless you wanna try it out Bri...

Brian: Fine. I'll do it. As long as S is happy. (This is how people start smoking)

Since Foxy Momma is taken, I'll be Husky1. AM a Husky1.

Where are the directions?

R: I'm going to type them up and post them. I can forward the instructions from the district to you both?

B: Sounds good. I have a phone date/ walk with K at 1 so it'll have to be before that.

R: I have to go pickup my sisters dead chicken from her coop and bury it around 11...

R: But also we don't have to because I think it's pretty straight forward. I basically wanted to know how to kick someone from the meeting. I can just imagine L yelling "pickles" out repeatedly and me having to kick him out.

Brian: My ChromeBook crashed at about the 12 minute mark yesterday while Casting. Had to start everything over. I am hopeful it can handle 5 non-Castify minutes.

Ever hopeful.

RR, you could have just said, 'Tm busy at 11:00." but I guess if I give you regular updates on our compost...

R: Crazy times. I need you guys to share in the weirdness.

Brian: Having done nothing related to this, I really don't want my test flight to be in front of 25 kids.

B: I am so impressed with your bravery R. I had to call for help when a squirrel drowned in our pool.

R: I feel nothing for birds and fish sooooo. don't ask me to bury your guinea pig because that's too far.

So what if we did this trial like soon to get it out of the way, I'm leaving at l0:15  or we can do it after 11 but before 1

Brian: Affirmative.

It would be nice to have at least 90 minutes to get my coiffure under control go after 11:00? What have you heard about my guinea pig?

B: Guinea pigs are only cute when they have no hair. I don't trust furry creatures.

The perks of having a bunch of kids.

R: Skinny pigs!

Also Brian...maybe you could have the same nickname as us to streamline?

B: No. They can't use the nickname until we start the meeting with the nickname. So essentially, they can't join the meeting until we create it.

R: Perfect. I just saw students can't create a meeting so that's perfect. Brian your code is Huskies51, sorry buddy. It makes us look more uniformed

Brian: Same nickname? Not Husky1 but we'll all be Foxy Momma? Yeah, I'm down with that.

B: Oh Brian.

Brian: "Huskies Five-One". Just dawned on me. That's the date.

Thought it was an "Area 51" reference; which would have been way cooler.

Checking.

1. Are we (well, one of you) sending out a grade-wide invite/expectations to everyone or are we doing so with our own

class by noon today?

2. Are we three doing a quick test run today sometime between 11:00 and 1:00?

B: I believe R already sent out the info in google classroom so we're good there. I can Bloomz it tomorrow

morning too.

I am hoping we do a practice one today close to 11. Want to start it since you haven't done it yet?

Brian: Okay, let me get my headphones just a smidge more charged and then I start. 11:15?

It'll be quick. 5-10 minutes in total. Just to figure out all the buttons.

Then I get to start shopping for a new ChromeBook. My first actual business tax right off!! Who's adulting now, huh?

I'll see if RW wants in on thig exciting action. For near on 2 decades, I've wanted to mute that woman.

Piece out!

B: Just text the nickname for us.

Brian: As much as I'd love "Brian's Foxy Mommas", J is probably watching us this very minute so how about "5th Testrun"

B: Perfect. Although I'm flattered at your first suggestion.

Fri, May 1, 7:56 AM

Brian: B was wondering about joining today's Meet Up. I assume he was also talking about B. What do you think?

R: Have fun, I'm expecting a slightly hot mess for trial 1

B: She can come to mine. I don't care.

It'll be messy.

R: R said today's her birthday and she feels like her best present is going to be talking with her friends.

Brian: Dr. P really needs to take a few moments to improve her YouTube videos.  Move the camera up.

Stop cutting off the top of your head. Ditch the white wall.

R: Yeah. We should take notes so our meet isn't bad.

Brian: It's just slightly better than a hostage level video.

B: Oh yikes. I haven't seen it yet

Brian: Starting work on my hair. Wish me luck.

BTW: We DO have the grid app already loaded?

R: I think so...

I don't know why I'm so nervous

B: You wrote out an agenda1!! Woah. I am woefully unprepared. Except for my doll head

R: I've got a Costco trip to take this afternoon. I need to cut these kids off. What time are you guys logging in, exactly 12?

B: I did Costco yesterday, There was zero chicken. No frozen no fresh, Nada. It was super weir.

Weird.

My kids are currently arguing in my google meet so that's awesome.

R: Your kids?

B: My own birthed children

R: Oh right. Those.

B: I'm secretly hoping few kids show up

R: Good luck

Brian: 6 kids singing Happy Birthday? Amazing.

B: I had 11 show up almost all girls. It wasn't terrible.

R: 14 kids, S and A kept coming and going. J showed  up for final 5 minutes. Next week we're playing charades.

B: We just talked a little today. J played some weird song she is loving right now and I couldn't mute her or unmute me fast enough to get it to stop.

Brian: All of my little ones. Just emailed you a screenshot. Enjoy. N was well, N and C were in motion the entire time.

The sound quality was terrible. Not sure what can be done about that besides kicking the chatterboxes out. seems an extreme solution.

B: I muted folks. I also told them to mute so we could each take turns talking. That wasn't as fun though.

Brian: Gonna send my attaboys to B. Reply to a couple of parents. See what T has to say then call it a day. This process was strangely fatiguing; a brisk lawn mowing will bring me back to life.

Just in time for what we used to call "The Weekend". Those were the days,

R: I miss weekends.

Brian: It's...impressive(?)

B's ability to not quite get  the info I asked for. In this aspect, he is Mr. Consistent.

(sigh)

B: Yeah. That's what I'm afraid of. Just another thing to manage.

Fri, May 1, 4:21 PM

Brian: Jeez, now S's leaving. Anyone actually going to be at CC next year?

R: Wait, who else is leaving?

B: A

R: Just searched my email and found her message...that's sad, but awesome she's able to take a year of absence. J did too.

B: But she's orchestra right? So she's kind of forced to

R: Band

Sun, May 3, 8:37 PM

Brian: Girls!

Just going for RB/MM tomorrow. I think what I'll eventually be aiming for are M-Th MyMath lessons with a quiz on Friday. That way, I can get the deadline for the quiz at a reasonable time.

(And it gives me another day for the new ChromeBook to get here. Really hating this tired old Acer. I think I'll also kill their deadlines. Everyone should be able to gain from my amazing lessons.

Posted Monday the 4th on Classroom. T talked about decluttering our G-Classrooms but I think ours is pretty easy  to follow.

I also moved this week to the top of the Covid-19 document. Tired of all the darn scrolling.

See you tomorrow! Be prepared to sit Agog at my beautiful "Shelter in Place" haircut. Photos can't really do it justice. 'Night, Ladies.

Mon, May 4, 8:42 AM

Brian: Dang. The number of kids who took the "U-3 Progress" quiz is a teeny, tiny number.

B: A lot of people are having trouble finding it still

Brian: Yeah, because it's closed. They had till Saturday to do it.

As mentioned earlier, I'm putting the kibosh on future closing times.

For what it’s worth, I reopened the quiz.

R: HAPPY CERT WEEK TEAM!

Just so you know, even though you probably already do, you two are hands down the best team I've ever had the pleasure of working with. I appreciate you both for your plethora of knowledge and constant support. Thanks for keeping me young team

B: You mean thank you for reminding you of your youth!

I think YOU keep us young. Truly. You're a pleasure to work with my friend. Seriously.

R: I just took the survey for grade placement next year and if T moves me I'm going to be a sour puss for sure.

B: I don't think he will. He better not! Unless he's got some kind of passive aggressive methodology

Brian: I am so glad you got the pleasure of working with me!

R: M’s got to be moving to 3rd, I think that's what he used to teach before moving to kitsap Got...?

Brian: Got?

Have had?

Will continue to have?

Pick whatever verb tense works for you.

R: Get is what I was thinking

B: No past tense here!!! It's current and future tense only.

R: "Mommy that hurts my ears. TURN IT OFF!" My offspring doesn't appreciate the efforts.

B: You like your sign? I thought you would. My pencil method was pretty lame but it was all I had.

Brian: "Happy Birth!" Who wouldn't love it?

B: I'm glad you had at least a somewhat good day considering the pandemic.

Brian: How can a weekend filled with a shave, haircut, facial, a hamburger (with real meat]), and a shelter in place cake NOT be great?!?

R, you are probably better off not knowing the details.

R: I like that you're reppin’ your math shirts even at home.

No carbs during your facial or were they just consumed first?! They forgot to draw you a bubble bath...I'm sorry.

B: That looks pretty plush.

Mon, May 41 2:49 PM

R: When did T say packets are for pickup? Never mind. I found it.

Brian: Just FYI, When I am recording lessons; I can't really do anything but record lessons. I even look funny at the ChromeBook and I have to start over.

Then I start the slooow process of saving it to the drive. I did 2 lessons today and the first one took an hour to upload.

And it was over 2 GB just by itself. Sure am glad Wavecable is forgoing data caps for the duration.

So the gist is I am incommunicado for a good portion of the day. If there is a student question that seems in anyway urgent, please pass it along via text. Thanks.

B: Got it,

5th Grade Team - 2020 Texts Part 7

Tues, May 5. 9:41 AM

Brian: Important Reminder: Our brilliant CC Librarian will just willy-nilly forward any old email to who everyone she wants! (Not catastrophic this time; just that yesterday, C remotely restored my ChromeBook while I was working and it was quite startling.)

B: That's weird.

All her emails to us are mostly forwarded so no surprise there.

R: I agree, at least do a strong copy and paste job

B: Right? My thoughts exactly.

Brian: Well, my YouTube videos were looking crappy and the “Clear browsing data" thing has never worked for me. I asked  D for a possible fix and she passed it along to JC.

(Again with the forwarding.)

J fixed the problem and I emailed  her my thanks.

This morning, D asked if the problem was fixed and I replied with my harmless quip about being startled. Which she forwarded to J.

Again, not terrible this time but something to keep in mind when communicating with our CC Librarian.

B: I am FULLY aware now. Jersey

Jeesh

Brian: Feel free to call me "Jersey"!

B: I will!

Tue, May 51 3:28 PM

Brian: S noted that I had Mozart in the background of my lesson video.

B: Awwww he is definitely dignified,

I got a new umbrella for my deck. It matches my house. This makes me happy today even though my video on my slide show won't work for the kids.

R: I like it! Mine is boring beige and tore on one corner and I sewed it...then it ripped again. I should probably invest

B: I replaced my beige one with this one. Freddie's had them for $40

Tue, May 51 6:41 PM

Brian: Keep me posted!

One of my failures today was trying to print off a class list from Powerschool. Now, I know we can't actually print to our home printers; at least T was positive about it. so I brought up the list and then shared it to my home email.

I brought  the document  up on my phone (having to sign into my school account) and then then printed it off.

And got blank pieces of paper for my troubles.

Is the above process even possible by, you know, a smart person? One who knows what she's doing?

My ultimate goal is to make a contact log to keep track of who I am communicating with. So today's entry for S would be something like "5-5 Question about background music during lesson" Very simple notes but I do want to have a general idea of whom I talked with. I know G-CL and Bloomz keeps records but I want all this info in one place.

B: I can print to my home printer from my school ChromeBook.

Brian: Doggonit! How could T miss this?

Now that I know it's possible, I'll fight with it tomorrow.

Friday, Jun 12, 7:53 AM

Brian: Hello 5th Grade Team!! We have traveled from the Distant Past (2019) to warn you what awaits you. You'll never guess…

B: Brian should get one with a stuffed rat on his head. Like Ratatouille.

Seriously Bri, when we had a rat infestation  in California and the  only thing that worked  was Decon. Lots of dead rat bodies to pick up but we paid the neighbor girl.

Is this Brian's iPad?

R. Let me know. I don't know if I can take a mask all day.

Brian: Yes, on Brian's iPad. (Being old) I prefer typing using all ten digits

R: No idea, But if it's a ploy to get out of wearing a face shield, it's not going to work.

I'm going to buy a set to try for Costco and goodwill travels. I'll have N print out everyone's name by August and we can stick them to our foreheads. She has different colors and fonts. Prepare yourself

Brian: Actually, I would like a pest control guy's name. Reason being that we're still hearing critter noises from the attic.

R: Also if you want one earlier I can hook that up too

Brian: So, the Modern Day Plagues of America:

B: Ok. Let me find it. I'll get it to you Bri.

Brian: 1. stupid Pharaoh 2. Plague 3. Rodents 4. Budget toilet paper 5. Moody child

R: #4 has got me

I bought Kirkland because that's all they had, guess what they have Charmin again. Not happy. Thinking about donating my Kirkland size one.

B: Ugh. Those ARE plagues. Add to that no escape and you've truly reached biblical times.

Brian: 6. Bad cops 7. Lack of exercise bikes on Amazon...Okay, I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel here.

B: You can donate it to me. We use at least a roll a day with all these butts.

R: Can you add trampoline to #7 as well

B: Get a Peloton!! I have been eyeing them but just can't pull the trigger.

R: Perfect, because right now I'm just putting it downstairs for K to use...it's not going quickly.

B: I must be ghetto. That Kirkland brand is awesome!

Of course my standards are pretty low, I just don't do one ply but other than that I am good.

Brian: Admit it! We all have a secret high quality roll stashed somewhere in each bathroom.

B: I wish. I thought Kirkland WAS high quality.

R: It's upstairs for ladies to use and K must go downstairs to use the toilet. There is a hierarchy in this house.

Brian: In my wild, misspent youth, "secret high quality roll" had a VERY different meaning.

For my youth as well. I could roll a great doobie. Blunts were more my style but those took some time...

8. Moronic hillbillies protesting their right to spread the virus,

R: The only roll I'm hiding is a cinnamon roll so I don't have to share #carbqueen

Brian: We all have our guilty hoard. My family has yet to figure out how 2 bags of sunflower seeds can last 3 months.

B: 9: zoom

Brian: ...Just visited amazon. I thought you were joking about the face shields having a "face shield" label.

R: I don't joke about PPE

B: I forgot I had a zoom this morning at 8. I raced over to login and as soon as I got in she put me in a breakout room.

This is a zoom that has 60+ people so I usually don't do anything.

Brian: WHAT was I thinking? Of course, Double R takes her equipment seriously.

B: Yes she does, I appreciate that because she can order and personalize and I can pay her.

Brian: What does the "9:zoom" message indicate?

B: The ninth plague. I am so sick of zoom.

Brian: Ahh! Yes! Me likes. We've nearly got a Facebook Worthy post!

B: I have been blissfully off of Facebook. You'll have to post for us.

Brian: I been lusting after all the exercise bikes and gliders on amazon. It seems somewhat sinful to spend $400 on a fake bike when I've got a perfectly fine (if dusty) real bike just sitting in the garage.

B: Yeah but it's rainy and messy outside...

Brian: And I probably shouldn't play on my phone while cycling in the real world.

R: I was going to go for a walk today on the CC trail because I have to drive out there for W's swag, but it's going to be gross out

Brian: See what I'm doing here?? This is called "rationalization".

B: You can come over here. What time? I have a zoom from 1-2 but we're free after that. You can meet Norman.

Ok. Maybe next week.

Brian: Yes, your life is yet incomplete without a vigil with Norman.

B: True. He is pretty great.

R: Never met him, but I have seen his glamour shots

B: He's laying at my feet. Because he's loyal and he loves me.

R: Also, two zooms on a Friday. Wth.

B: Right? That's why I hate zoom.

The one I'm in now is distance learning and the one this afternoon is a book group. My LAST book zoom for this book.

Brian: Or he’s just too lazy to move.

I name him "Enorman·ous”

B: Ha! The Camp Bow WOW people call him Gi-Norman

Brian: That is also acceptable.

I am currently reading a book on the history of bourbon. Maybe not completely work· related.

OR is it?!?

B: Could be... if R gets face shields I can buy the straws.

R: I'm getting face shields! It's happening this week

B: Oh My Word

She just gave us homework

Brian: Again, lol

B: Not. Did not!!

R: Tell me you're getting paid for this PD

B: No

This distance learning one is pretty useful.  Hidden figures on the other hand was terrible.

R: I saw S yesterday and she's also doing a PD on distance learning,  maybe it's the same one?

She said basically they're just pushing videos of yourself because it meets the majority of students needs

Brian: Like those A-mazing end of year videos that we all worked on?

B: Probably. There's like 15 cohorts of 60+ people each. It's statewide. It's a google one.

They are saying don't give new instruction in a google meet. Record it so kids can go back and review things if they get confused.

Right now she's going over our modules we have to do as homework.

Monday, Jun 15, 7:23 AM

Brian: 10th Plague: Artemis Fowl! I'm considering burning my Disney+ subgcription over what they did to the lovely octogenarian Dame Judi. How could they…?                                                    

R: Really? I want to watch it. I haven't read the books though. Did they mess with Judi DENCH?!? THE Judi DENCH?!?!

Brian: All three of us read the books and spent the 90 minutes thinking, "Why did they change that from the book? What were they thinking?"

Like, say, having Dame Commander of the British Empire Judi Dench play an elf police captain. Wobbling around in green pleather the entire movie.

Why, Kenneth Branagh? WHY did you agree to direct this pile of offal? And the two of you were so amazing in "Murder on the Orient Express".

R: She was an elf captain? In green pleather?!?! That poor woman. She was probably so sweaty throughout filming. Kenneth Branagh directed huh? Does he usually direct? Maybe he only read the script and not the book.

Brian: I kept thinking "That woman's going to keel over any minute." From my limited knowledge, KB usually directs whatever he's in. He heard of the books from his nephews. seriously doubt he actually read the first book since it bears little resemblance to AF#1.

Hey RR!!.. Here's YET another text you maybe don't need to read! Aren't you glad you are in this children’s literature thread?

R: Well, I couldn't get past the first chapter both times I tried reading it in elementary school soooo...

B: I never even cracked the book open. The premise sounded weird. She's too good for this. Oh Judi.......... couldn't you say no to the hat??

Brian: I know, right? Is it possible to arrest your agent for elder abuse?

B: She should. I feel like a small man dressed as a woman would've been more appropriate for the part.

R: Back to the drawing board. Silver ridge has our time slot. What time no that Wednesday at noon doesn't work

B: What about today at noon? Can we just get it over with?

Brian: Getting it over with would be my preference. Shockingly, my schedule today is wide open.

B: R!!!! What about you? You open today?

R: T’s meeting at 10, IEP at 11, middle school al 12?

B: Get it done!

We have one at 10!? Holy crap I'm glad you told me.

R: Okay, I have nothing going on today

B: We could give ourselves a break and do 1 instead.

Who wants to schedule it?

R: I say let's plunge through. I'll email

B: Perf

Brian: Bang, bang, bang. Let's knock them out. I didn't know we had a 10:00 Staff Meeting till TT sent out the Zoom link.

B: By B, Brian, and R

R: He said something last week, but honestly I forget right after I'm told anything. Side effects of a pandemic, I guess.

Thu, Jun 18, 7:03 PM .

Brian: So how did clean up go today?

B: Done in two hours. Don't know what I'm gonna do with all the crap I stuffed in a variety of places today. Crap from my classroom into a variety of places IN MY CLASSROOM BRIAN!!!

R: Also two hours deep. I went rouge and pulled everything away from the walls hoping they'll clean behind it.

Brian: Sheesh...

Yes, but at any time, did you go rogue?

R: This was pretty much me the entire time. Walking in circles forgetting what I was doing.

Brian: Whoa....

B: Yeah. Lots of walking in circles.

R: Also someone stole my recycling bin

I'll be over it by August, don't worry team.

B: I'm pretty sure you left it in my classroom because I have like four.

R: I never brought it out? I just used your wagon, however I will take one off your hands!

B: Take it!

R: Monday it's MINE

B: I'll bling it out for you.

Brian: Okay, well, that conversation happened.

So, about tomorrow. I've got a check up in the morning, a family Zoom meeting in the late afternoon and I'll be checking on X's math grade throughout the day. Other than that? I'm free.

B: Me too

Brian: I'll write up my sad little "Summer Math Fun!" Paragraph and get it to you by early afternoon. C told me RB was shutting down for the summer. This surprised me. If EVER there was a summer to throw a little extra learning for July/ August....... But that's above my pay grade.

B: Closed!! That's stupid.

Brian: And I'll ponder (perhaps in a befuddled state) as to whether I should tell the parents of J and J that their child's  last math quiz of 5th grade would probably go better if they took over 4 minutes to complete.

Yes, I foresee much befuddlement.....

B: Yes. Or lots of not caring.

Fri, Jun 191 7:03 AM

Brian: I can't even muster a paragraph. About math. Please include something to the effect that kids can (should?) continue to work on math over the next two months. While Redbird will be off-line for the summer, both Moby Max and iXL will be available till the fall. (B, I don't actually know about the iXL part.) Believe in yourself. Try your best and…

yadda, yadda, and finally, yadda.

And thus, Brian pour out a 40 for 19-20.

This being 2019-2020, it's a 40oz. Bottle of Perrier, because that's the only carbonated drink we can get home delivered.

'Cause it's awful.

And we're very white people....

R: I have like 3 science websites they could access. Should we also create a Summer "topic" on Google Classroom and create an assignment for each resource?

Except that's basically like the resources tub we already have...

Brian: Will the Classroom stay up and running all summer?

B: I think it will. I've been told they should have access all summer.

What if we make the resources topic the very top of the classroom and rename it Summer Resources?

I'll muster something up at some point today. IXL I think might be done by now. They gave me 90 days way back in March.

IL will be available until July 31 and SORA and tumblebooks should be available all summer long. I'd like to focus on just a few. That way they don't feel overwhelmed.

R: Science A-Z is available all summer (or at least the majority), and it’s books and videos.

B: Perfect. I'll add that too.

Fri. Jun 19. 9:51 AM

Brian: Ugh....Once they can reopen, the Y will probably be requiring reservations  on their Y App go I've spent the last couple of days trying to sign onto the stupid thing. Even emailed J at the Y to ask her to check into it. (I got a robo-reply saying she wasn't currently working.)

So, as I was writing a second plaintive email to some other poor Y employee, it occurred  to me that I might not have

Hazelwood's app.......And, yep! YConnects didn't recognize my email because I don't go the Virginia Peninsula YMCA, (Mutter, mutter...)

R: Even the zoo with memberships you have to make reservations for visits. W's going next week, that's why I know that

B: I wanna go to the zoo!!!

So much for spontaneity in our lives.

R: M kicked me off the membership, sorry I'm not paying $12 a head

B: What?!? You didn't negotiate that in the divorce?

R: Well originally I renewed it and made sure his name was on it too, so that W could go no matter which parent she was with but he doesn't think so...nicely

B: Ugh. $50 for our family to go and that is if we leave J at home.

I guess we'll be going to woodland park zoo. I haven't been there and I hear they have gorillas...

R: Might as well buy a pass at that point.

Also I want to go to the woodland park, it's HUGE in comparison. Save me a seat in the minivan

B: Consider it done. Sometime this summer my friend. What are you doing with your old Traeger?

R: The heat setting wasn't matching the thermometer, so we took it back to Costco and got the newer version. We've only had it since October so that shouldn't have happened. Now we've got a sweet smokestack and it's slightly bigger.

B: Nice. I was gonna put in a bid for a hand me down. I don't know how to operate a sweet smokestack but I am intrigued.

His pulled pork was super good.

R: Seriously just put pellets in and turn the dial onto desired heat. I haven't cooked on it but I do know how to turn it on

B: Also, side note. Island lake park is open. They have a little swim area that isn't completely gross. You lost me at pellets.

Just kidding. I know what they are. I just don't know how many to use

R: I'm about to clean out last year’s pool, that is completely gross…

B: Yeah. I remember those days.

(A guidance counselor: Mr. K, from a local middle school wishes to conference about some of our [now former] students)

R: Didn't we just talk to him?

B: No. We talked to the RI guy. K is the CKMS guy.

Brian: (Sigh) I leave you gals for a couple hours and look what you’ve gotten yourselves into…

R: Shouldn't have checked my email

Brian: Too many Zooms. Can’t keep them straight; especially when playing Tower Balloon Defense on the other monitor.

B: Yes, Tower Balloon Defense is very engaging.

R: I'm planning my elopement and watching my kid splash around the pool. It's crazy.

Brian: I’m free for whenever. Signing A’s book was my only official duty today.

B: Seriously? Eloping?!?!

R: No, I’m not eloping.

B: I fully expect to be there.

R: Vegas is out.

B: I eloped.

R: Again. Not eloping

B: You could slope anywhere.

R: K can't leave the state because of his job

B: Elope. You can slope at the courthouse.

Brian: Is he a bank robber?

B: Elope

It keeps autocorrecting.

R: DoD hos strict travel restrictions for employees

Brian: Sorry for the incontinence of these dumb texts.

B: Also you can't be there, it's an elopement not a wedding

Brian: An actual quote from a parent.

B: PO courthouse.

I have some friends who could marry you. I happen to be in with the pastors. Yes I can. I'll be your official witness.

Brian: I can be the UNofflcial one.

B: J and I had to pay for our witness. I'll do it for free. Brian will too.

R: I was thinking a weekend in Chelan

B: I can pack up the minivan.

R: Because I can't justify the price of that place otherwise

B: I've never been there and being your official witness would be reason to go. For realsies. The S's love and support you.

Brian: I will require a lovely boutonniere as payment. A really big one.

R: I just want like a ring, a kiss, and a few good photos. I can't handle anything else. Also you're getting a carnation

B: I'll pay for Brian's big flower as my gift to the shindig

Brian: Yeah, so about Mr. K...

R: Where's that list of all the kids going?

I swear we talked to him last week, because isn't R going to CKMS and we talked about him

B: Just asked H for one.

BTW: Chelan is very nice. Just a medium drive from Winthrop. Hot as Hell in late summer, though.

R: Hey, what's happening in Winthrop? My sister just asked me about it today and I thought that's where you grew up. Any place for a girl’s weekend?

Brian: The Methow Valley: consisting of the towns of Mazama, Winthrop, Twisp, Carlton, and Methow, is a lovely piece of Heaven in the North Cascades. Winthrop is the touristy town so most folks just say "Going to Winthrop" as shorthand for Methow Valley.

R: I'll google it now that I have a positive review

Brian: The Valley has booming cross-country skiing, downhill skiing and fat-tire mountain biking in the winter. And hiking, river rafting, mountain biking, and horse back riding in the summer.

R: But for 4 grandmas pushing 30 in August? Non athletic type River rafting might be good. We can't do Chelan twice haha

Brian: Anyone a grandma by age 30 might be ready for anything.

B: Sounds fun. Grandma river rafting is so my style.

R is going to RI by the way. We haven't met with CK yet. We don't have a lot of kids of concern going that way.

I have the list.

Brian: The Valley's population has nearly doubled since C-19 appeared. Roughly half the properties in the Valley were for vacation and since shelter in place, a butt-load of Seattleites just decided to ride out the plague, while working remotely from their cabin in the woods, One result being that my eldest brother, who has the local internet business is booked out till MID-JULY to get homes hooked up. Crazy.

B: My CB is dead though.

Good for him!!

Brian: Just make sure you wear a mask. Much grumbling about "people from the Coast" bringing their City Germs over to God's Country. ("The Coast" being defined as anything even an foot west of Steven's Pass)

B: I have lots of masks. If RR gets us our shields we would look on fleek.

Brian: ...look on fleek.....

B: He he. That was me being dorky.

Brian: T just asked if we're all available right now.

B: I am. Give me five.

R: I'm not going to wear a mask while floating. I'll put a shirt on. Sun bathing isn't school appropriate.

B: No masks on the river. I feel like that would be drowning waiting to happen.

R: Do we have a zoom link

Brian: Actually, T just wants to contact  me. He's in a meeting right now  but will contact me. “I want you to help me out on something very important right away. Can you?"

B: Nice. Handle it Bri!

R: Is this another spam

B: Oh.   It could be.

Brian: Oh, fudge. You might be right.

R: Wait are we zooming with middle school right now or...

Are looking at H’s email I would assume her notes are enough.

Brian: Yeah, the email is “*Redacted*” Note the extra period. I call shenanigans!

B: She just said she doesn't have time and we could just add notes. That's bogus!!!

Brian: Check email. “T" is telling me I'll be "rewarded bountifully afterwards'. I don't know. Sounds kinda tawdry, don't you think?

B: Yes. Tawdry is a good word,

I wanna see the ring R!

R: Oh I want to hear more about this bountiful reward. I haven't seen the ring yet

B: Who did he take with him to pick it out? Someone reliable?

Brian: Yeah! Sounds great. Granted, rushing out to Walmart to buy gift cards is a big ask but being bountifully rewarded........

B: Ha!!! Hand them my way please. My Nigerian Prince friend said he will pay you double for them.

R: Maybe you're gelling a ring from Walmart Brian

Brian: But my beautiful Russian 2nd Wife also wants to pay for her plane ticket with gift cards. Guess I just don't understand finance.

R: I've been watching 90 Day fiancé: Before the 90 Days and you've got it right.

Brian: Okay, so no rushing to Walmart. No Zooming with K. But we are supposed to write notes on specific kids on the doc  H shared with us?

B: Yes. That's the plan.

Brian: Wait, K is on CKMS list. Whom were we just talking about her to?

B: We weren't.

We talked about M.

Brian: Come On, brain! Work with me here!

Fri, Jun 19, 5:27 PM

R: I don't want to brag, but my kid is borderline famous. She was the last one pictured with 10 seconds left in video. How do I know this? Her teacher emailed me, you know because I didn't even watch the video when it was sent out earlier

B: Nice! C is somewhere in the awards video but we didn't watch it.

S got nothing so that is part of the reason.

R: Oh I haven't watched the awards or the graduation. This is just kids during remote learning. Yeah I submitted a picture of W doing speech

B: Did we get access to the promotion? I didn't even look at it. I've seen all the pictures though. Cute babies.

R: I don't think so actually

B: Meh. Oh well. This year was a bust.

Sat, Jun 201 8:09 AM

Brian: Where are these promotion videos to be found?

B: I have no idea.

Afterword:

This journal went from early March to late June of 2020. During this time, the Covid-19 pandemic went from a Seattle and New York news story to a world-wide crisis. One result was a crippling of the US economy. The national unemployment rate went from 3.5% in February to 13.3% in May.

Also during this time period, the nation (and world) had massive protests movements which demanded social justice for communities of color; long victims of systemic racism.

And all the while, the President managed to make every part of the crisis worse. And continues to do so.

Despite this, the CC 5th grade team worked diligently to distance educate their students. They would not claim it went well; that no mistakes were made. They worked hard, were flexible and met each situation as best they could. This despite the many frustrations and setbacks. Team 5th was weighed in the balance of this crises and was not found wanting.

Whatever fall 2020 may bring, they will continue to do so.

2020 Texts Part One

The early plague years: January to March of 2020

This is a record of some of my texts to friends (mostly teacher-types) and family during the first half of 2020. It starts with stunningly bad prediction for the year and ends with my near death experience. Because of the slightly scattershot nature of text conversations, nearly all the texts are mine but for the purpose of clarity, I have included a few of theirs in boldface.

(And my “friends” amusement at said experience.)

Obviously, once March rolls around, the subject of the texts drift towards Covid and all the fun new experiences and concerns that came with.

Curtain Opens On A New Year……………

(Honest to goodness, this was my first text of 2020; a reply to well-wishes for the new year.)

Jan. 1st 10:37 AM

Sig and I wish you a very happy 2020!

Yeah, we’re really planning on 2020 being a step up from ‘19. Which SUUH-uuh-ucked.

See what you can do about that, eh?

(Author’s Note: File the Above Under “Dramatic Irony”.)

Jan 17th

Pretty sure this just isn't something I'm interested in watching.

Ever.

Jan.18th

On the Infirm Ancestors Beat, the old man’s going home from the hospital soon after a day of being treated for near-fatal constipation. Quite a scare there.

What a way to go.

...

(So to speak.)

...

Honestly, it’s impossible to describe the situation without it seeming like a wise crack.

...

(See what I mean?)

...

Thank you! Thank you!!

You’ve been a great audience!

I’ll be here all my life!

Good night, everybody!!

👏👏👏

...

...

Seriously, I could just keep squeezing these jokes out all day.

Must.

Stop.

Bad.

Pun-age

Mar. 11th

JB, not to be alarmist but have you folks considered flying home early?

Never crossed my mind

(Below sent to B this AM to try to cheer her up.)

Dear Sad B,

Our Beloved Leader wasn’t completely clear in his remarks last night. (Shock!)

Looks like you could still to travel TO Europe.

Getting back though....

Hmmmm.. Sounds like the set up for a Lifetime movie of the week:

“A young American traveler finds herself forced to remain in romantic Spain for an extended stay.

No demanding family.

No humdrum job.

Big slobbering dog 3,000 miles away.

What shall she do?!?”

The Hallmark Channel and “Ultrathins: The Bathroom Tissue That Will Last Twice As Long” is proud to present one of the following!

Trapped in Barcelona

Catalonia Confinement

Iberian Love Prison

(Okay, that last one might be less Lifetime and more uh, “other” premium cable channels.)

Should probably get to work.

P.S. R, still monitoring the Mexican Beach Situation. So far, your Vaca looks a go!

Mar. 12th

Back to FL next month? Have you been following the news?

No I’m returning from FL on 26th. Supposed to go to Mexico mid April but that’s not looking good for the home team.

District just pulled the plug on school till April 24th. 😟

Girl, you really might want to get back home soon.

Mar.16th

Do you still have to go to school? So much for AR! What have u heard about airports closing? Kelly said only 7 open in US but FAA website not saying anything.

We can work from home. Not sure what that would look like. B, R, and I are going in today at least to work on distance learning for our 5th graders.

Not sure about the airports closing. I HAVE heard some airports are starting to screen people for fever before letting them onto the plane. This adds SEVERAL hours to the process.

That said, I wouldn’t be surprised if air travel gets curtailed eventually. Whatever shit storm Italy’s going through will probably come to the U.S.

Guess hitch hiking home from Florida won’t be so bad...

March 17th

Hey Bros!

Day 2 of my Shelter In Place ordeal proceeds. We teachers showed up for work yesterday only to be told to go home. Which I did but only after ensuring my 5th graders had at least a week's worth of math, reading, and writing to look forward to.

Actually, most of that stuff went home Friday. At lunch that day, we got The Word from the High Mucky-Mucks that we were closing up shop till 4/24. Yesterday, we spent our time putting as much material on-line as possible.

Not sure what we teachers will do next week. I am positive that the Superintendent doesn't know either. We will continue to get paid; that's one nice thing.

After getting home, I worked outside; mostly on the fruit trees and lawn. Today, I shall put on my vintner's cap. The raccoons are polite about it but I can tell they're really impatient for that first crop of grapes.

Am checking in with D and T every few days. Thus far, both seem to be doing well but a supply run to Lake City may be in my near future. We are well-provisioned thanks to Mrs. H's foresight.

(Or CNN-induced paranoia. Take your pick.)

I realize that going bonkers from boredom is a luxury afforded by having a kick-ass union. A problem many people would like to have right now.

Not sure what but if you all can think of any assistance we could provide, speak up. Even though Wendi really doesn't want me leaving the home except under the most urgent circumstances (granted, neither does the Governor), I can make my escape for family.

Forget your hands; clean your cell phone.

March 17th

Saw this at the graffiti wall in Bremerton. What will become of our students for six weeks if this is where they start 😭😭

Well, I for one think people SHOULD start using their Brian! The world would be a much better place, don’t you agree?

You’re not wrong...

March 20th

I think the best thing to have done would have been to send the Chrome Books home. Or at least check them out to certain families. Granted, that would have entailed sending the charging chords home as well but it would have been something.

Yes, a tiny fraction might not have internet at home. That seems like a base problem. Let the Navy solve that one.

What is Zoom?

(Author’s note: Cue the dramatic music in the mini-series.)

March 20th

As am I; as am I.

We teachers keep getting messages from the Superintendent to "keep working from home".

Well, this week, I worked on the lawn, the fruit trees, and the grape vines.

Not sure what other work she means.

Least we're still getting paid. For all this work done at home.

I've been twice weekly checking on G'Pa Larry and Tina. The former is taking this shelter in place business seriously. Unsure whether I can say the same about Mrs. H. 😐

Best go see if there are any further instructions from my District OverLady. (That's a word, right? Can't call my female boss an Overlord.)

Adios!

March 20th

Okay, been searching high and low for a why embetterfy Jackbox. There is an App called Houseparty which might just be the ticket.

I could put my phone on a stand facing the TV. Anyone with the HP app should be able to see everything.

...I would need to use the iPad to actually play JBHP and could could put the on it as well. Hmmm.. You young folk are more tech savvy that I. Your thoughts?

P.S. Embetterfy is the 2020 Word of the Year. Show your coolness by using it in every situation.

March 21st

Call it: 1:34 PM.

I'm out of my PJs!

Why? Why?

Well, when your 16 year old sons gives you that, "Geez, WHAT a slacker..." look.

More than one time.

March 23rd

Ahhh! I am exposed!!! (Stupid zipper)

Lol! Sorry Brian. You're doomed

March 26th

♫ (Shhh) Wendi is in the kitchen, inventorying all our frozen foodstuffs in the fridge, whilst dancing to "Can't Touch This!" being played on the Amazon Echo. ♪

It is the best of times, it is the worst of times.

And Alexa doesn't sound in anyway judgmental when asked to repent the song.

...

Repeat. Repeat the song. 😂

March 28th

Message From Your Minister of Mirth:

Very well. The Fine People have spoken!

Tonight at a few minutes before 6:00, I will send out a Zoom invite.

Currently, we have 8 people willing to give this Brave New Experiment in Fun a go.

Depending on how many people actually show up AND which game we choose, some of us may need to be audience members.

The first person in the cheap seats will be Yours Truly but we may need additional folks. These folks can log into the game and have some influence on the game's outcome. This just depends on the game.

If this goes well tonight, and it's something we'd like to continue, I could easily see this becoming a weekly or even twice weekly thing. And opening it up to more of CC.

It's got very little set up required and a minimum of 4 people required.

If so, I'd probably spring for the pro version so we wouldn't need to worry about time limits.

But that's a worry for the future. Right now, let's just focus on having a great time tonight.

See you at 6:00.

Stay Classy, Silverdale

Your Earl of Entertainment And for Pete's Sake, take that post-it off of your tablet's back-facing camera!

March 28th

My dumb son decided to make himself a lunch of potstickers.

The recommended serving size is five (5).

He was just about to tuck in to his plate of : 🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟🥟 🥟

when his mom entered the kitchen. 😠😠😠😠

March 28th

It’s important to know your place in society.

-Solid scapegoat.

Maybe THAT’s why you love that goat so much.

The original scapegoats were a pair of goats; which (in theory) helped the ancient Hebrews avoid Divine Retribution.

One was sacrificed and the other was released into the wilderness; taking all the villagers’ sins with it.

I’m not taking the fall for all your wicked, wicked ways, Mrs. W!

I much prefer the term “whipping boy”.

We can do that WB. Can we call you Wubs?

Whatever works for you. I just want to be accommodating!

Mar. 28th

Wendi's decided to start farming. Our mini-greenhouse will be up and running by the end of the weekend.

In the meantime, we have the "Plantinator".

We're going to have a lot of tomatoes, cucumbers, and peppers this fall. 🍅🍅 🥒🥒🌶️🌶️

Now if we could just raise our own car food..

...

Granted, Tanith and Brooklyn do seem to nibbling on the sugar 🐜 , which have appeared over this last week. Ants are calories, right?

Darnit! I meant "cat food". Our cars don't need much food right now.

So I don't garden nor do I want to. I will eagerly encourage and cheerlead as you garden. I will just as eagerly take any excess vegetables you have during harvest season and ooh and ahh over their tastiness so you will feel doubly satisfied with your bounty.

Well, I'm not really good at doing the 'abundance of grains and new wines' thing.

My...3 apple trees, 2 plum trees, and one pear tree and numerous grape vines have produced a STAGGERING 5 pieces of (barely) edible fruit among them.

So, we're really counting on Wendi's green thumb.

Mar. 29th

No Covid for me!!!!!! I’m coming over!

The drawbridge is up. Keep out!!

2020 Texts Part Two

The early plague years: April to July of 2020

April 9th.

Chef Bri's Favorite Lock-Down Recipes!

Well, going through the Grab and Go Bucket, I am surprised to see a couple of our ERBars are nearing the end of their 5-year shelf life. Time to make lemons into lemonade!

Step 1: Move it to the kitchen!

Step 2: Carefully remove the bag.

Yum!

Step 3: Dice it.

Step 4: Serve with garnish.

Delicious!

In a dry block of dusty graham cracker way.

And I've got 2 more to finish by the end of the month!

Maybe if you put it in a smoothie? Or, does that defeat the purpose? 😂

Just give them to the squirrels Bri.

I feel like you should hydrate it somehow.

Yeah, I use spit to moisten it.

...

My own.

And you'll wish you'd been a little more appreciative of my recipes when we're celebrating our 6th month of Shelter In

(Author’s Sarcastaside*: Yeah, six month’s would be unthinkable.)

*”Sarcastaside” Portmanteau of sarcastic and aside. Use in writing is a strong indicator of the writer’s pomposity. As is the use of the word pomposity.

April 7th

How can we look up what Kansas schools are doing?

Kansas? We're following Kansas's lead?? Alabama was too ritzy for us?

Ha haaaa!!

April 7th

The quarantine is getting to me. I suddenly feel the need to get a bucket of food for my family. I feel woefully unprepared for disaster because I don't have freeze dried food.

As I drive by later today, I'll thrown a couple of my expired food bricks at your house. No need to thank me; I'm just that awesome.

I'm almost done with my dyno-bites then I'll draft something. The team can beef it up 😍

Whoa whoa!! You're already to the Dino-bites? Pass yourself, girl.

I'm saving mine till June.

Darnit! "Pace yourself".

Apr. 8th

Go look at your minivan.

You’re awesome! Thank you so much. Ava was very excited about the gym and Sam was excited about the mask. I am excited about the toilet paper 😂😂

And thank you for labeling the bleach.

Just make sure to wipe down everything. Who knows where that bag has been. 😷

Gym? I included a gym? My memory is going...

Gum. Why does gum autocorrect to gym? What is my phone trying to tell me?!?!

Gum! Yes, gum. That makes more sense.

Apr. 10th

After 3 days of observation, I have yet to see any squirrels eating out of the "spicy" bird feeders on the right.

I'd call that a win!

April 11th

Okay, nothing like your nearly 4 weeks of lockdown to really focus on what's important in a marriage. WHAT is this container of disinfecting wipes called?

I eagerly await your responses.

-I'd call it a pack of clorox wipes. Yeah, sounds right.

I'd say "L, go get the pack of clorox wipes." L replies "We don't have 'CLOROX' wipes." I sigh "You know what I mean..."

Thanks for bringing that up Brian. Just thanks.

-I don't think I ever clarified the container it's in, but I always just call them wipes.

-We call it a pack. -Ha, ha!! Yup I call it a pack of wipes, too.

-Yes. That's there are three kinds. Baby wipes, face wipes and Clorox wipes...

Who is winning Brian?

I said "bag" and she said "box".

We both lost.

But she lost more.

Apr. 16th.

Wendi has been unleashed on the garage so it looks MUCH better now. She’s also tending to her crops; we have 5 or 6 plants out in the greenhouse. The rest are doing well in the Plantinator. (I sent you a photo, yes?)

Last night, we spent over an hour watching videos on growing potatoes in 5-gallon buckets......Not sure if this is a good thing....

One of my humor fantasies (yes, I have them. Stop judging me.) is making a parody of Ken Burn’s The Civil War. Something brilliant like, “Ken Burn’s Shelter in Place”. People recount the horror of getting their Amazon order cancelled while old-timey photos of an empty amazon cart slowly floats across the screen. Meanwhile (again with that old timey look), we have some dignified (sadly, this probably means old and white) actor: Sam Waterson, Jeff Daniels, Garrison Keillor, reading off the President’s tweets.

Yeah, that would be a hoot.

...

Well, I’ve procrastinated long enough. Best turn 15 degrees to the right and start working on the Chromebook.

Adios.

...

Oh, and Xander continues his buttheaded ways. I’m out of sunflowers seeds and am down to 5 gum packs. And my weight set, ordered over a month ago, will NEVER get delivered. Situation looks grim.

...

This is the REAL tragedy of C-19. This beauty hasn’t moved in weeks.

Apr. 17th

Call it! 1:57-Brian is dressed!!

(Wendi’s working outside.)

Good job Bri!

Apr. 18th

Can I do a door drop off at your house?

Sure. We’d like $20s and $50s.

Ok mr moneybags! I want to give you ur bday present early cuz I’m bored and require a good laugh!

The most clandestine delivery has been made

Time to get back to my nude gardening!

Now you tell me

April 21st

I'll share it with you when I get back from my walk. Mama needs a break.

Yeah, I hear you. My Fitbit's asking if I still have legs.

Apr. 22nd

Still waiting. You finish “The Good Place”? I am dying to discuss the show with a respected and trusted friend. But you’ll have to do.

...

😂

...

Apr. 24th

I made pickled eggs today.

And planted some lavender.

.....

These are not...completely analogous experiences.

But I thought you might want to know.

I just farted

Thought you’d want to know

Apr. 24th

Anyway, Wendi's Amazon order came in. The TINIEST rolls of TP. I guess East Asians have really small butts. Not like our supersized ‘Merican f’tasses!

However, it's what W could get a subscription for.

🧻🧻🧻🧻🧻🧻🧻 (Actual size)

Lol! The last pack I picked up at rite aid.. the rolls are so big they don't fit my dispenser.

Apr. 26th

Yo, B! I joined the Google classroom as DJ so I can lurk around.

Just thought you should know.

Thanks. I haven’t figured out how to add B yet. Have you added BR? I know there’s an email with directions but i saw that S already had trouble so I didn’t even try.

You are talking giving them substitute access?

Yeah, that’s somewhere on my To-Do List. Haven’t really looked into it.

I figure giving BR access to Moby Max AND our G-CR is a good start.

My goal for today is to Castify my first math lesson so it can go on-line first thing tomorrow. Big Step. I also need to add some brown (or carbon) to our new compost barrel. I’m thinking dead leaves, sticks, newspapers, and a truckload of shredded cardboard. (If only I could go back 2 months to get a hay bale!)

It’s “new” only in the sense of new to us. The Bs weren’t using it so X and I picked it up yesterday.

Today, Xander is attempting bagels.

And shredding a truckload of cardboard.

.....

Brian’s “List of Things I Would Purchase If I Could Go Back To February 1st” just keeps getting longer and longer.

And loonier.

I’m with you on that list. Who would’ve thought I really wanted wood cleaner.

April 26th

Recently, Wendi and I spent over an hour watching videos on how to grow potatoes in 5-gallon buckets.

I would not say Google Meets is a priority.

Google Meats now....

May 3rd

Hey, how goes things? Sorry I took so long getting back to you about the time.

Didn't realize I hadn't sent "Whatever the...." text until after my facial. And that was after my 3 hour hair cut.

I know: white people problems. 😭

July 4th

The Dumbest Suicide Attempt.

The time: Thursday night.

The victim and his wife are watching TV and he decides to do two things at once: First, he pops a few extremely minty gum balls into his mouth and starts chewing with gusto. While he’s getting a good minty mouth, the victim takes out his foam roller to do some stretching exercises to loosen up his oft painful neck and shoulders. The first step of the physical therapy regime involves lying flat on the roller with his head hanging over the end; allowing him to slowly tilt his head back.

Gravity working even on really dumb people, all that delightful mouth mintyness pours into the victim’s nasal cavity. What was the feeling of freshness has now turned to a nasal inferno. Lying on the floor, the victim starts to cough and choke. With his last bit of strength, he gets upright, tilts his head back and waits for gravity to save him from being the subject of the World’s Lamest Autopsy Report. Victim’s wife can only look on at this sad, sad scene in despair.

I’m trying really hard not to laugh. 😂