Little Ranch Hand

5/7/2006

Well, this weekend went well. Xander and I got to the Ranch early Friday evening. Our first boys’ only trip. Xander very much enjoyed feeding the cows, saying hello to the cows and saying goodbye to the cows. Harold may have a future reliable ranch hand one day. Certainly more enthusiastic than his lay-about son-in-law.

Despite the somewhat non-toddler proof status of the Ranch House, we left this morning with Xander sporting nothing worse than a scratch on one finger. And of course, life being life, within 20 minutes of getting home sweet home, he managed to cut his ear open on a kitchen counter corner. We trundled down to urgent care (for about the bizzionth time this spring) to see if he needed stitches. While waiting in the urgent care lobby, Xander fell out of the chair and gave himself a black eye.

I swear, we’re THIS CLOSE to making him wear a “special child” helmet 24/7.

Well, the doc was able to glue the cut closed. At least Xander’s getting used to urgent care. He gave the doctor a hug. (Who said it was his first patient hug since leaving Georgia. Come on, Washingtonians! Where’s the love?!?)

Provided we survive tonight’s bath, we’ll keep in touch.

Brian

Xander’s Coming Out!

4/9/2006

Of his sleep sac, that is. Lately, Alexander has been showing a delightful habit of taking everything off BUT his sleep sac. He’s quite the little Houdini. Thursday night, I went up to check on him and there he was: asleep on his bed. Sitting right next to him was his diaper. Almost like it had been teleported off of him.

So, it seemed time to try something else. Friday night was his first go at going “au natural” and it was a success. Nothing but jammies. Wendi and I went up to check on him, oh, about every 15 minutes and also to remind him about the Ultimate Doom awaiting him if he even thought about removing any clothes. (That is, we’d close the door for about 5 seconds.)

Two nights in a row and he’s doing fine. Granted, I think he’d be happier if he stopped taking off his socks but cold toes must be his price for wisdom.

Xander continues to ask for Busy, Busy Town, despite the fact that he destroyed it last week. I always make a big show of bringing out the corpse and explaining how sad it makes me.  L

On the brighter side, we’ve been reading another Richard Scary book: “The Best First Book Ever” which is very similar to “Town”. Maybe he’s getting them mixed up. But he enjoys the book and last night as I was putting the laundry away, he sang the ABC song all the way through. (Alright, he forgot the “t” but that’s a minor letter anyway.) Knowing the ABCs AND keeping his clothes on?!? The boy’s obviously gifted. Now if we could just work up the nerve to start potty training.

That is all for now. See ya!

Brian

A Lazy Sunday

1/8/2006

   Well, Wendi’s in the living room playing Nintendo, Xander’s upstairs absolutely not taking his afternoon nap. In fact, he seems to be jumping off his bed which is very loud in the office below which is where I am. Ah….domestic bliss.

Speaking of the little imp, he’s into the “running into Daddy at top speed” phase of his life. Okay, he has been in this phase for quite some time but he’s bigger and faster now. (He needs to slow down or I need to start wearing a cup if he has any hope of siblings.) He further likes to finish his sprint with a sleeper hold around my neck and an enthusiastic “Ug! Ug! Eeeze!” shouted into my ear. At least he’s polite.

He also loves EVERY ONE of his 5 new stuffed toys and likes to keep them all with him at all times. The sight of him trying to stagger down the stairs, his arms full is very funny. And then I dash up to try to keep him from falling.

The included pic was taken at Jeff and Maria’s place on Christmas Eve. Xander loved their house, what with the dogs, cats and doors that open and close. (And open and close….) Dad’s hand-made gifts were all lovingly made and look not terribly 3-year old proof. So Xander only gets to play with them under closely supervised conditions. “Yes son, you may look at the toys behind the plexiglass but that’s it.”

Well, I think I should go bug Wendi to ensure she doesn’t fritter away her weekend by relaxing. Wish me luck.

B.

The Most Awfulest Time of The Year

12/28/2005

Okay, so maybe “awefullest” isn’t a word but you get the idea. We just got back from Winthrop a few hours ago. The previous 5 days in Winthrop were not fun. Why, you ask? The number one reason was a stomach flu which first hit Xander at 4:00 AM on Thursday. Either fortunately or unfortunately (your call) his sleep area was only a few feet away from our bed in Wendi’s room so we were right there when it happened. You’ve never seen a kid look so startled to vomit.

We got him cleaned up as best we could but then the explosive diarrhea started. One moment-calm baby. The next moment-POOF! Insta-crap everywhere. His lil’ Pampers Cruisers just couldn’t hold it all so Xander got the great pleasure of taking lots of baths.

Starting Thursday night, we all started falling like dominos at about 12 hour intervals. First me. Then Wendi. Then Holly’s oldest stepson Zac (17), then Harold (too old to count). And finally Hunter (5). The final two hadn’t completely recovered by the time we left this morning.

Tina, Keaton and Holly and Bill all remained germ-free. That latter two claimed their many screwdrivers consumed throughout the day would protect them and apparently, it worked.

Despite all arguments for a Just and Loving Supreme Being, Java the dog remained perfectly healthy.

The only good thing about this Noel Plague is that for everyone under 80, the sickness lasted under 24 hours but oh, what a memorable 24 hours. I can say without exaggeration that from noon to midnight on the 23rd was the worst 12 hours of my life. I couldn’t even walk from the bed to the toilet without having to take a little lie-down halfway between.

Wendi’s experience with concurrent explosive diarrhea and projectile vomiting was simply too graphic to discuss in polite company. Let’s just say there was a lot of nasty, nasty laundry to do and anyone besides Tina would have said, “Eeeeew! You take care of it, losers!”

Okay, another bright side to this dark cloud is that we are certainly going to be below the 8 pound weight gain for the average American over the holiday season. Adkins and Southbeach got nothing on spending a day trying to decide which end to point at the toilet bowl.

The official mascot for Christmas 04 is the bucket that several of us took to carrying “just in case”. I took some nice pictures with the idea that maybe it would make a nice Christmas Card photo 12 months hence.

So anyway, the Wife, Son and I are glad to be home. Talking with Tina this evening, Harold is up and about and Konnosan had come by soon after we left with latex gloves and gallons of Lysol. She then spent most of the day disinfecting every portion of the Ranch House she could reach.

Well, hope the rest of your holidays go well. Take care and wash your hands. A lot.

Brian (of Brian, Wendi and Xander fame)

Still Working on His Bed Technique

10/17/2005

(#34 in an apparently never-ending series.)

I didn’t know one could sleep on one’s head but if you’re tired enough, anything is possible.

(Note to CPS: We put him back in bed after taking a few dozen pictures.)

Our Little Angel

10/16/2005

After about, oh, 3 hours of bedroom anarchy: talking every book off the shelf, “riding” his rocking chair, taking his new pillow out of the pillowcase, screaming “Dad!!” about a zillion times, jumping up and down on his new bed, pulling the picture off the wall, and reading all the floor-level books twice, little Alexander finally collapsed, if not “in” bed then at least sort of on it. He was so pooped out that the Wife and I were able to clean his room, straighten his bed and put him in it, all the while taking photos of our son on his first night in his new Big Boy Bed.

I suppose it’s too late to buy a “Grande” sized crib, isn’t it?

Xander’s Big Night Out

10/11/2005

Hello All,

I know some of you got some Xander photos recently; hope this isn’t overload but I wanted to write it all down before all the details escaped my brain.

Sometime starting last summer, Alexander was able to escape his crib, much to Wendi’s shock. She put him in the crib and then went to fold clothes in our bedroom. She turns around and there he was. Yikes! Stuff like that always happens in cheesy horror movies. And now in Silverdale, too.

Our only consolation was that he was not in his Sleep Sac. No way he could make the leap to freedom encased in his bright yellow sleeper. Or so we thought.

On Sunday, I get home from Ross Lake to learn our little boy is growing up, at least in terms of physical prowess and deviousness. He CAN get out when he wants to and he wanted to. The baby monitor was just too great a target. I go up to check on why things are suddenly quiet (Yes, I know: Too Quiet.)  and there he is, hallway over the rail, looking at me with a big “I’m just too cute to punish” expression. Yes, he did look terribly cute but this was his 3rd flight to freedom of the evening. We tried putting him into the playpen downstairs and creating a sleeping area in the Family Room where Wendi and I were. Neither experiment had the desired effect of helping him drop off. We just ended up rocking him to sleep. (Not a habit we encourage.)

Last night, it was more of the same. Amazingly, my heartfelt lectures on the importance of keeping to your assigned station had no effect on him. One amusing occurrence was when Wendi and I were downstairs watching TV and we hear the sound of the music box come over the monitor. (Not really a “box” but more of a musical, light emitting saucer-thingy) The music box that was most definitely NOT left in Xander’s crib so I zip up there to his room and what should I find but Xander sitting calmly in his crib with a big smile on his face, music box exactly where we put it. (Again, thank goodness we don’t live in a cheesy movie!)

So after the wife and I discussed it, we decided to accept reality. The crib went. Okay, only went across the room because the %$#@! thing wouldn’t fit through the door without some major deconstruction. At least more than we felt like doing at 9:00 at night. But, on October 10th, 2005, our little boy slept sans crib.

At first he thought it great fun watching Mommy and Daddy change things around in his bedroom. Out came the vacuum cleaner, away went the toys in the closet. What was the flat thing on the floor? Now this was intriguing….

However, it soon dawned upon him that things were radically changed! This was an imposter bed! And after 10 seconds of lying there…..

…..he decided he didn’t like it! He didn’t like it VERY MUCH!

It’s a hard lesson but after an hour or two of crying at the door, along with having his parents come in now and then to rock him a little or just be with him, our much-abused child finally fell asleep.

My sense of order won out over my common sense and I put him back on his bed. To my complete and utter non-shock this morning, I saw it didn’t stick.

Well, added to our “To Do” list for this weekend will be to tear down the crib, investigate whether that crib really can convert to a bed as advertised or possibly shop for a real toddler bed. Something classy like a race car.

That’s our exciting adventure. I can only assume this is some sort of cosmic karma for all the abuse I put my parents though. (As Wendi [and sometimes Tina] reminds me all the time, SHE was the perfect child.)

Sigh…The jobs of parenthood.

Much tired.

Brian and Wendi.

Hard Working Little Dude

10/2/2005

What with working out and doing the laundry, who has time for other things? His two year check-up went well; still a bit on the tall side, on the thin side, and his head? Let’s just say he’ll need to special order his football helmet from Big Headed Bob’s Boutique.

The only downside is that he’s still behind the curve with his talking so, after talking with a Speech/Language Pathologist, Wendi and I are trying to keep our language down to his level as much as possible. No more sentences about “evisceration” or “delayed capital gains”. Ah, the sacrifices parents must make.

Because our friends the W have done it for their daughter N, we have also bought Xander his own little table. He seems to like it. The other big news is that we’ve just put on what will probably be our last baby gate; this one in the Office. The “baby-proof” door knob covers don’t even slow him down anymore (though they do confuse Grandpa Larry all to hell) and he’s too fond of pounding on keyboards.

That is all for now.

B/W/X

Summer 2005 is Circling the Drain...

8/25/2005

Tim-bo,

It looks like another summer done gone and went. Gone and went without you and me hanging out. This week I've been working on my classroom as well as trying to finish the DVD of my cousin's wedding in late July. Oh, and sort of getting used to the idea of being a two career family after two years of having a stay at home wife/mother. That last part blows, btw.

Wendi started her job last Monday. Everything about it is perfect except it's in South Tacoma so her commute is a bitch. She has a bit of latitude in terms of her schedule so she misses most of the bridge traffic but it still kinda sucks. I think Xander misses his mornings with mommy-what with watching Sesame Street and all. He's been going to Ms. Jana's daycare part-time since last April so this shouldn't be too much with the mind­ bending. Lil' X-man's been quite the little choad in the mornings though. Next week, when I'm officially back to work, Wendi will be worrying about taking him to day care.

In theory, we're going to start trying for the "spare heir" any day now but Wendi's kinda  like to drop a little weight before that. I'd like her too also but not just because of the dangers of pre-eclampsia. So we're at least trying to eat better: no caffeine or artificial sweeteners. Pretty soon, we're have to say good-bye to the hot baths. Damn.....

What else? My Dad and I are building a HUGE deck out back. We've worked two long weekends on it so far. It was my first experience with Trex. Though expensive AND heavy as hell, it's a dream to work with. We've got one more weekend to put the railings on. Eventually, we'd like to add a gazebo on one side, lights and lattice work for shade. But these things won't be this summer.

Dad's gotten his ego involved so this is gonna be the most economical yet beautiful

deck ev-uh! Sometimes, I think Dad doesn't know how my wife's mind works....

Las Vegas was fun though D (of D and V Fame) always seemed in a hurry  to get somewhere and do something. We felt the need to stick together which was probably a mistake. They've put in a monorail since our last trip so that made getting around a lot easier and cheaper. (That is, the City of Las Vegas; not D and V.) And, of course, meeting a Klingon at Quark's Restaurant Rocked!

The trip was in theory a bit of a let down since our expectations were so frickin' high; it being our first in about 3 years and the last in who knows how long?

This summer was also all about Podcasts. Holy Smoke, I listened to a lot of them on my iPod. It's an addiction. You joined the PodCult? You don't need an iPod to do so though how anyone could live without one is a mystery to me.

I had also hoped to finally, finally, after a few starts/stops, play System Shock2 all the way though. I picked it up from a bargain bin a few years ago and have been meaning to play it ever since. In July, I got off to a good start but then dropped it for a few weeks and when I returned to it last week, my laptop's all %$#! up. Won't boot up. What a pisser. Well, no time right now, anyway. It'll be tough when Civ4 comes out later this year, though.

Of course, with Wendi now working again, maybe I can get my monthly allowance  back. Then I can start saving up for something cool (in 2007).

Grandma Hardy finally died in late July. I say finally, 'cause she's been living dead for several years now. It was costing G'Pa $4K a month to keep her in an Alzheimer's home  and she didn't even recognize him. It was my first honest to goodness funeral though. (Mom just had a wake at the Winthrop Barn.) Those darn caskets are heavy!

Green Day's American Idiot rocks!! Listen and get pissed! (In a good way.)

I only got to see one movie this summer and that one wasn't that good: Dark Waters. I'd planned to see everything I'd missed over the past 2 or 3 months. Looks like I'll need to wait till DVD.

Teaching summer school wasn't all that fun. These special ed. kids were the biting,  screaming kind. I may just take a pass next year.

I'm still waiting to hear the reviews of my wedding DVD. It went into the mail so they (my cousins J and K and my Aunt B) should get them today or tomorrow. There were a few glitches that I just didn't have the time or energy to fix (a few credit font sizes being too small being the worst offenders), some video that could've been edited a bit more and a toast that I didn't tape. C'est la vie. If nothing else, the fact that this was going out to who knows whom meant I actually tried to polish it a bit more than my usual "45 minutes of Xander walking around" type effort. I certainly learned a lot about what not to do for the next DVD.

Ah, Xander got his first real haircut. You can see how bravely he took it.

Well, that's all for now. I gotta go fold laundry or something. Tell me about your exciting summer and plan a trip to lovely Silverdale. Maybe we could meet in Winthrop. You ever go over there anymore?

Chow.

B

Just Waiting for the Wife

3/13/2005

She’s out having a late lunch with friends from her former workplace. Last week, it was Saturday evening Scrapbooking. Seems like it’s always something.

I really shouldn’t gripe too much as she has spent so much time cooped up at home during the week with an unhappy kid.

Speaking of the Xander, he’s miserable. He’s feeling miserable. For the past few weeks, it’s been one rash after another. First, they thought it was a yeast infection so we spent a week slathering a feminine product all over his diaper area several times a day.

What fun.

That didn’t do anything so upon further consultation with the fine folks at Group Health, it was determined to be eczema and so it’s cortisone and moisturizing lotion. That seemed to do the trick up till yesterday when some sort of new spotty-type rash appeared on his torso and neck. The concurrent fever seems to have gone away but who knows what we’ll find when we check him tonight? With the exception of looking rather odd when out of his one-piece PJs, he doesn’t appear to be suffering terribly. His appetite seems a bit off and he’s a bit more fussy than usual but he’s no longer scratching like crazy. Unless, he’s outside running around (a favorite past time of his), he’s been very clingy and whiny.

He’s currently out in the living room in his play pen and I’m in the office. I needed a break.

Yes, I know, this time 40 years ago, you and Mom had to drive 3 tiny screaming babies to the emergency room every night for 3 weeks straight AND YOU WERE GLAD TO DO IT!

Harold, Tina and Holly’s Family came over last weekend to help celebrate Wendi’s 37th birthday. We went to Red Robin and had a great time. Well, an okay time. To our not-shock, Xander was quite squirmy; Wendi and I took turns taking him outside for a quick walk. The boy just likes grabbing food.

Wendi’s job search is going… uh... rather slowly. Xander’s various maladies have taken up her time. In theory, we might wait until summer, thus putting off the terrifying prospect of putting Xander into daycare for another few months.

Last Tuesday, all the 5th graders went to Benaroya Hall to be exposed to a little culture. It was nice. Like many if not all my students, I’d never been there before. What’s worse, many of my students had never been on a ferry or gone to Seattle. Talk about limited cultural experiences.

Well, best see to the child’s needs. Lord willing, he’ll eat heartily, have a less motley ass and drop off to sleep immediately. Hell, I’d be happy with just one out of the three happened. It’s the little things.  

Love,

B.